Zeke Pipher (who’s excellent blog is here) tweeted out a New York Times article by a woman who has both had and committed an affair. In “A Roomful of Yearning and Regret,” Wendy Plump talks about her experiences with infidelity, from the perspective of the perpetrator and the victim.
NOT long ago, the friend of a friend spent the night in a hotel room, which is sometimes what you do when you find out your spouse has been having a yearlong affair. His flight was sadly predictable — it’s all many of us are capable of after discovering such a betrayal — though I am sure he now realizes that mere movement is not a fix for that kind of agony.
I know this for two reasons: No. 1, I have had an affair; No. 2, I have been the victim of one. When you unfurl these two experiences in the sunlight for comparison, and measure their worth and pain, the former is only marginally better than the latter. And both, frankly, are awful.
Are you thinking of having an affair? Before you do anything else, read her lament.