Letting Go

They were little: crawling, babbling, teething, walking, sleeping, waking. First it was preschool, then elementary, off to middle school and finally into high school. Plays, concerts, classroom parties, volunteering, cub scouts, girl scouts, softball, karate, gymnastics, practice, soccer, swimming, art projects, science projects, religion, mock trials, honors classes, MUN, AP, IB, MSA, GPA, SAT’s, college applications and 18 years later …University.

It’s here, the time when they go. For some, our children left us a long time ago, for others its now and for the rest, it will be later. There will come that time when those little babies that we held in our hands will leave. A reel goes through my mind. Have I been the best parent I can be? Did I give them the tools that they will need to be able to live an honorable life? What insecurities I have did I pass onto them? Could I have done different? Will these questions have answers… some yes and some I will have to wait and find out. There is really no point in feeling bad about what could have been. As parents, we do the best we can under the circumstances we are in and what we knew best at that point in time. Can we learn from mistakes, sure we can, can we do different and be better parents now, of course!

Watching them go is as if they were birds, you feed them, take care of them, give them the nurture, love and support that they need and then you open your hands up to the sky, let them go and watch them fly away. You know that there will be hardships but there will also be opportunities.You pray they come back safe and sound and happy.

As a mother, I have given all that I can give and now it is time to see how far they can fly.

Nehal El Guindy

Nehal El Guindy is a Licensed Clinical Counselor in Maryland and a graduate of the Johns Hopkins University. Nehal currently has a private practice, LeVant Counseling, in Urbana, Maryland. She is a mother of a son and two daughters and enjoys hiking, reading, socializing and traveling.

  • Hagar

    Masha’Allah, this was soooo inspiring. You just gave me that boost that I was in need for. I once heard someone say exactly what you are saying; that we raise our children; we put ALL THIS EFFORT into them, investing in them, just so that they can leave us one day. And our goal is that when they leave us, they will be functional, upright, of sound minds and hearts. I think that’s what all parents want. May Allah grant that to all our children. Beautiful post, thank you!

  • Marwa

    JAK Nehal for this reassuring post. I constantly question my actions as a mother and I found your last sentence so poignant, “As a mother, I have given all that I can give and now it is time to see how far they can fly.” Oftentimes we are so hard on ourselves that it takes a lot of courage and dismissal of self doubt to say that I have given it my all. I look forward to your future reflections!

  • Dalal

    Beautifully said, thanks for giving us newby mom’s a glimpse in the -what will seem like- not so distant future :)

  • suma

    AA Nihal,
    Loved the post!!!Brings comfort to my heart.JAK

  • Maha

    Very encouraging, jak. :)