The Preying Vulture

This is the second part of A Vulture Tried to Eat My Face.

Having beaten myself into exhaustion

ascending a mountain I had no place on

a shadow slid across my path

before a lord of the sky descended to hover

just out of arm’s reach

a vulture, majestic and hideous

head cocked

blinking its oily black eyes at me

unabashedly curious

“Oh, my God!” I thought, “Look alive!”

so I straightened a bit and

picked up my pace, a bit

fixing my eyes straight ahead

as one does when being stared at

by a hulking eater of carrion

But then—for aren’t I of the dominant species?—

I stared boldly back at Lurch on wings

who then swept up and disappeared behind me

back to the sky, I supposed, back

to circling in that realm between God’s heaven

and earth’s death

Wrong

For the pink, scrotum-headed spectre

reappeared on my right side

and at the sight of the floating beast once again so near

I stumbled

the sound of my chaotic crumbling odd

against the quiet muffle of the mountain

whose heartless rocks

exacted from me their own price

being some skin along my arm—

and I was bleeding!

while just beyond the trail

high above the valley below it

hovered the dark creature

who, as I sat desperately clutching my fresh red arm

silently fixed his gaze upon me

wondering, perhaps,

if the God of vultures

had finally smiled upon him

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About John Shore

John Shore (who, fwiw, is straight) is the author of UNFAIR: Christians and the LGBT Question, and three other great books. He is founder of Unfundamentalist Christians (on Facebook here), and executive editor of the Unfundamentalist Christians group blog.  (In total John's two blogs receive some 250,000 views per month.) John is also co-founder of The NALT Christians Project, which was written about by TIME,  The Washington Post, and others. His website is JohnShore.com. John is a pastor ordained by The Progressive Christian Alliance. You're invited to like John's Facebook page. And don't forget to sign up for his mucho awesome monthly newsletter.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    I'm afraid this is the last of this particular story.

  • http://hismasterpiece.wordpress.com hismasterpiece

    So to put it in smiple terms…a vulture was coming after you and you slammed into some rocks while trying to somewhat escape it?

    Uhm.

    Well at least your life seems pretty exciting. :D

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    No, see, if you put it like that, it sounds BORING. But if you turn it into a POEM, see, it's suddenly a fascinating account, filled with rich philosophical nuances and compelling asthetic revelations galore. See? Because it's a POEM. That makes it rich art, not a boring story about how a giant bird freaked me out so that I tripped.

  • http://ww.sheppardministries.com Greta

    Talk about a cliff-hanger! Obviously it didn't get you…you're still here!…there must be a purpose on your life,John-boy!

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    I'm just glad that my life's purpose wasn't to become bird food.

  • FreetoBe

    I gotta tell you, John, I so enjoy your writing! "God of vultures" and "scrotum-headed spectre" are just two of my favorites in this! What amazing word pictures you create, with humor thrown in for good measure. Thanks for sharing your gift.

  • http://www.mediocrity.us David Barach

    HA! Cliff-hanger. Nice one, Gretta!

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Oh, yeah! Cliff hanger! I didn't register that. Duh. Thanks for noticing it, David. you rock.

    Free: Thank you, very much. I really appreciate you taking the time to pen me these kind words.

  • http://www.steppingintothelight.net Diane L. Harris

    Are you a Honeymooners fan? Bang zoom, to the moon, John. A poem is the end of the story? Why I oughtta…

    Hey, it's your perogative.

  • arlywn

    john…. we told you to stop smoking. lol. too bad you werent nice to the bird- he might'va granted you some wishes or something.

  • Latoya

    I thought you said this was gonna be just two logs. LOL. Well it has been two but this cannot be the end of the story.

  • Angie Palmer Kilian

    OMG. The boys loved that one…especially the thought of the God of Voltures smiling @ the pink scrotum-headed spectre! Tons of lol! Thanks! Angie Palmer Kilian

  • http://christianranter.wordpress.com Des

    This kind of reminds me of ravens when they take nuts and drop them in the middle of intersections so the cars will roll over them; cracking them open and unveiling their tender goodness. Your vulture was trying to get you to fall off the trail, cracking you open to unveil tender goodness.

  • http://thesearethecrazytimes-christine.blogspot.com Christine

    For the pink, scrotum-headed spectre – seems I am not alone in adding this to my all time favourite description of a vulture EVER!! John, as per usual, you rock my pretty boring day, thanks for the laughs :)

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Des: TOO FUNNY!!! That is just hilariously put. I'll never sleep again, of course—but funny!

    Christine: Thanks. As I think you know, everything I publish here on my WordPress site also goes on Crosswalk.com, which is very conservative. I'm wondering if they're going to let the scrotum thing stand. Stay tuned!

  • http://mormonsoprano.com Mormon Soprano

    John, ohmigosh. Dr. Freud could have a heyday with this poem. LOL!!!

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Mormon: Really? Do you think?

    Oh, no.

    Man, I hope you're wrong.

  • Candace

    I don't like the English words for our various genitalia. They are all so … icky-sounding. Not fun. What are the equivalent words in other languages, I wanna know. Like Italian, or French. Bet they are much easier on the ear. If so, I'm switching.

  • FreetoBe

    Candace, I know one in a different language:

    Hodensack (Sack of …….)

    Is that easier?


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