Seattle Attorney Time Travels

to Gettyburg Address and Lincoln’s assassination.

I completely believe every word.  Time travel has been around for 40 years–or 150 years depending on what you mean by “been around”.  And Time Travel always places the subject right at the moment of immensely important historic events, and never in a dental office in Poughkeepsie on a Tuesday in 1956.  In the same way, past life regression always reveals that the subject was Nefertiti or Napoleon and never some illiterate toothless German peasant who farted and told rude jokes and then died from an infected toe when  he was 18.

Mostly, as I look at the incredibly windy accounts our Hero gives of himself (including one Youtube interview that is a whopping *six hours* long) I find myself thinking that the most useful thing time travel would allow me to do is get to the end of all the amazingly lengthy YouTube yarns this guy spins.

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  • Fr. Bryan Brooks

    My time machine experience sees this guy as the future host of a new series for the History Channel.

  • Blog Goliard

    Not buying it. No blue police call box, no sale.

  • Dave

    I am also a time traveler. I go forward at the rate of one second per second of actual time.

    • Ted Seeber

      Lucky you. One of my symptoms of Asperger’s is severely screwed up time sense. I’m always running either a fraction of a second fast or a fraction of a second slow, and the ridiculous amount of stress this causes is the primary cause of my migraines.

  • JB

    Re “past lives”, as someone who used to hang out with lots of American New-Age types who all beleived in reincarnation, in my experience not a single one of them ever “recalled” any “past life” in any time or place unfamiliar to 20th century Americans. It was always “during the (American) Civil War” or “ancient Rome” or “ancient Egypt”, NEVER anywhere like “a Fijian island in the 300s AD/CE” or “a mud cottage in what is now Tajikistan”.

    And they never remembered any OBSCURE time or place of the ancient Roman Empire. None of them remembered living in Thrace and speaking a dialect of Macedonian during the reign of Emperor Valens in the Fourth Century. It’s always “in Rome” where a tiny minority of the empire lived. And for some reason no one who claims to remember a past live “in Rome” can speak any Latin.

    • MikeTheGeek

      “And for some reason no one who claims to remember a past live “in Rome” can speak any Latin.”

      No problem there – I live in Austin and hardly anyone at the corner mini-mart speaks English.

  • MikeTheGeek

    “And for some reason no one who claims to remember a past live “in Rome” can speak any Latin.”

    No problem there – I live in Texas, and hardly anyone in the local grocery store speaks English…

  • MikeTheGeek

    Whoops – sorry for double post. (So in apology, I post again…)

    • Dave

      You should really apologize for your apology post. That was not necessary! :-)

      • Dave

        Also, did you REALLY post twice? Or are you both time traveling from a different location in the future?

        • Blog Goliard

          What double post?

          (Oh, I get it. That hasn’t happened yet in my time stream. I’ll keep an eye peeled.)

  • Mark R

    I already watched Safety not Guaranteed.