Simcha Fisher Talks Sense…

to bedwetting panicmongers.

If some stranger came to me and said, “I thought I overheard your wife say that she is a Zoroastrian who spits on Jesus Christ” my first thought would not be, “Could this possibly be true? Is everything I know of her a lie? What do I do? O what do I do!!!!!”

It would be “Who is this guy? Why would he think my wife would do something so ridiculously out of character? Is it a case of mistaken identity? Him Not knowing English? Ignorance? Bad hearing? Stupidity? Malice?” The absolute last thing I would ever consider is “My wife is secretly a Zoroastrian who spits on Jesus.” Not happening. Not in this universe.

People who keep panicking about the Pope every time the press reports something weird have the same effect on me as people who would instantly and easily credit it should somebody claim my wife said she was a Zoroastrian who spits on Jesus. It seems to me to be a judgment, not on my wife or on Francis, but on the people who keep having panic attacks. Be not afraid, for Pete’s sake.

As near as I can tell, the basic rule of thumb in play here is this:

  • When the pope says stuff conservatives like and the MSM twists it conservatives blame the MSM.
  • When the pope says stuff conservatives don’t like and the MSM twists it, conservatives call it a “media debacle” and they blame the Pope.

It’s moments like this I miss the WiFi outage.

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