I’ve never thought about the burden movie critics bear

…till I passed on to Steven Greydanus the strange, terrible and hilarious news that Nicholas Cage will be starring in a Left Behind movie.

He replied:

It’s totally true. Been watching this with fascinated dread for awhile.

I replied:

It must be such a crushing burden to have to bear this knowledge in silence while an unsuspecting world goes on about its business, oblivious to the doom it faces.

His response:

Ours is a high and lonely destiny!

  • jroberts548

    If there’s anything that can move Left Behind from insane evangelical crap to transcendant insane evangelical crap, it’s Nicolas Cage.

  • http://decentfilms.com/ SDG

    With the glory of being the Eparch of Catholic Filmic Criticism comes a terrible responsibility and grief. Who knows what perversity lurks in the hearts of filmmakers? The critic knows.

  • Fr. Denis Lemieux

    ‘Not the bees! Oh God, NOT THE BEEEEES!’ Really, I can’t see what could possibly go wrong with this film. Maybe he’ll wear a bear suit. That would be cool.

    • Tom

      Then hijack a bike and punch some women.

      • Francisco J Castellanos

        …while his face is on fire.

        • Jared Clark

          …which he’ll then swap with another man’s face.

  • RedMeg1990

    OH NO!!! We have a family tradition of watching awful Nick Cage movies. But (gulp!) Left Behind?!?? May have to break with tradition…

  • Jason Hall

    Has any once-successful movie star ever fallen to a depth greater than playing Kirk Cameron’s character in a remake of a kitschy evangelical end times flick? Any thoughts, SDG?

  • Mark S. (not for Shea)

    What was the old early ’70s evangelical apocalypse flick? I’ve seen it but can’t remember. I would rather they remake that, because I would LOVE to see Nicolas Cage fighting giant grasshoppers.

  • RichFader

    My understanding is that the reboot covers the day of the Rapture, period. So no Nicolae, no Tribulation, none of the other stuff. It’s like doing “Lord Of The Rings” and ending after the Baggins’ birthday party. I’m not sure why they’re even bothering.

  • Dillon T. McCameron

    Don’t suppose any of you fine folk would have come across a website doing a delightful job dissecting the Left Behind books in your travels? I misplaced it many years ago now, but only got a few chapters in.

  • Doug

    I’d never thought of that, but I bet it DOES help if you’re high…


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