Interview re Forgiveness

Check out my latest interview on Mormon Matters regarding the concept of forgiveness within the context of abusive relationships.

Abuse and the Forgiveness Dilemma

How do I teach my kids about pornography?
The Effects of Excommunication on All of Us: Healing Perspectives
Advocacy against Female Circumcision
TLC’s My Husband’s not Gay…
  • Anon

    This conversation appropriately re-frames the forgiveness paradigm in context of extraordinary abuse etc.

    Please take the time to listen to it if you are struggling to comply with the divine injunction to “forgive all men” RE particular grievances. There isn’t any need for you to beat yourself up over this issue–victims suffer enough as it is!

    Thanks for posting the interview, Natasha!

  • Anon

    Would you please consider a poll for former missionaries? I am very interested in the post-mission experience of former missionaries (in terms of present activity in the Church, faith “status,” marital status, personal growth, education, employment, etc.).

    Personally, I had a VERY difficult missionary experience that has precipitated serious consequences in the years since. I’m sure that I’m not alone… I wish that the Church would address this more explicitly (people do not like to talk about poor missionary experiences–here’s looking at me, “Anon!”).

    Thanks, Natasha!

  • Anonymous

    My three-year-old son has an affinity and (dare I say it?) obsession with bare feet – how do I know if it is an unhealthy obsession and how do I help him, if so?

    At day care when he was only twenty months old, he would remove the socks on babies and put his face on their feet and keep it there until he was discovered or until they managed to wiggle away from him. To this day, he will stalk family members and visitors in our home who are sockless. He will get under the table at dinner time to have some one-on-one time with feet. With my own feet, he creeps closer and closer, and perches himself on the floor right next to my feet and then reaches out to touch them. In the past I have always discouraged him, but recently I wanted to see how long and how far he would go if he got his way. With a ton of intensity, he squeezed, pet, kissed, carressed and talked to my foot. It took about seven minutes for him to lose interest and move on to something else. I then wanted to see if that would be the end of the issue, but it’s happened two more times since.

    When other people touch his feet to tickle him, he’ll say things like “feet are gross!” or just giggle at the tickling.

    I don’t want to make an issue if it’s no big deal, and I don’t want to make it worse by forbidding it or allowing it if it is a big deal. If it’s just a phase, I’m concerned that it has been a consistent and persistent one for over two years. He has some other social quirks, but none that concern me as much as this. Developmentally, he has generally met all of the appropriate milestones within the appropriate window, though he talked early and is often mistaken for being older due to his communication skills.

    I genuinely just need to know what this means for him, and how to feel about it as his mom.
    Thank you for all you do and the important difference you are making the quietly desperate lives of many.

  • Anon

    A cursory Google search reveals that your son is not alone in his interest in feet. The preponderance of anecdotal evidence suggests that he will probably grow out of it, as have many other children (some who were also interested in feet, other in shoes, etc.). I give that as purely anecdotal support for my own opinion (and I am not a professional care provider of any sort), that it is probably not a concern.

    As an aside, whenever we lend anything “negative fascination,” it tends to become an object of increasing interest (search this blog for posts about masturbation, for one), in my observation. Therefore, unless it is actually hurting him or others, I don’t think that I would personally worry about it too much.

    I’m curious what Natasha’s response will be…

    Good luck!