on being a Bibliogian©

By the power vested in me by the Internet, I hereby invent a new word, Bibliogian©. Anytime you use it footnote me and send me $1.

Theologians, church historians, and philosophers have their own words. So why can’t I?

Hi, my name’s Tim and I’m a philosopher. My name’s Susan and I’m a historian. My name’s Ruprecht and I’m a theologian. 

Hi, my name’s Pete and I’m a Bib. . .  uh . . .

Bible guy,

Bible person,

I do Bible,

biblical scholar.

You see my dilemma. And if you don’t, you’re part of the problem, not the solution, so stay out of this.

I don’t like using the noun “Bible” as an adjective. Noun modifiers make the grammar gods unhappy. Plus it’s cumbersome and as I said I want my own word, which is the entire point of this post.

Using the adjective “biblical” generates it’s own problems.

Calling myself a “biblical guy/person” sounds like I am trying to assert my orthodoxy when what I am after is a job description. “Biblical scholar” fails because, not only are we back to 2 words (where I want 1) but it’s pretentious:

Hi, my name’s Pete and I’m a biblical scholar. You’re not. Please don’t approach me, speak my name, or make eye contact.

Someone who “does” philosophy is a philosopher, but I have a feeling “bibler” won’t catch on. Say it 10 times fast.

The closest we “Bible people” have to our own word is “biblicist,” but that sounds awkward. A typist is one who types; a stylist is one who styles hair. A biblicist is one who bibles (?!).

Of course the big problem with “biblicist” is that it suggests biblicism, which is a crazy person’s way of reading the Bible, and I’M NOT CRAZY.

Biblicism is the tendency to appeal to individual biblical verses or collections of apparently uniform verses from diverse contexts to give the appearance of quick, authoritative, and unimpeachable solutions to what are in fact complex interpretive and theological issues generated by the fact that we have a complex and diverse Bible.

What I do as a “Bible guy,” etc., is to not do that and try to teach others not ever to do that, either.

Plus “biblicist” sounds too much like “Baptist,” and my tolerance for open-mindedness only goes so far.

So biblicist won’t work. We need our own name with -ian at the end, and Bibliogian© is the perfect solution.

Bible + logos (the study of) + ian (one who does that, and with formal training).

This is a great word and I hereby humbly force it on you. Say it 100x and it will stay with you forever.

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Pete Enns is a bibliogian, and his most recent bibliogical book is The Bible Tells Me So: Why Defending Scripture Has Made Us Unable to Read It. [See? Rolls right off the tongue.]