crappity crap crap…

… I have poison ivy. Really bad. Like deformed arms, grotesque, mutant freak bad. Like shield your children’s eyes from my sight bad. And I am miserable. Oh, so miserable. And itchy. Gnawing off my arms would more tolerable than having to endure any more.

So I did what any wussy person who cannot tolerate the slightest bit of discomfort does – go to the doctor and cry for meds. Topical numbing creams and pills to help me sleep, please. Blogging is such a state might make for humorous reading but I hate having to explain myself in the morning. So I have been staying away and catching up Netflix instead.

Have you heard of this show called Mad Men? I know, I’m not “with it”. Anyway, I’m 1/2 through season 2. It’s quite good but rather sad. And there is so much sex. Is this considered regular TV programming now? Back when I had cable, about 10 years ago, this type of programming was reserved for HBO and aired at 10pm, when all the decent people were in bed. Now I hear sexy time is the norm. I feel like a voyeur watching some of this junk.

The show is pretty good though. I think it’s about smoking. Or drinking. I’m fine with that. I like the dresses and the men look so dashing. But why is everyone so sad, I mean, it takes place before Vatican II when everything was perfect and there were no heretics.

I can’t understand why everyone’s marriage is the pits in this show. There was never a time in history where every single marriage was oppressive and sucked, so is it such a stretch for the writers to give us one happy couple. It’s like some grossly exaggerated intentional effort to discredit the Cleaver stereotype. I see what they are doing there but is being like June Cleaver supposed to be the horror among horrors for modern women, because I kinda liked June. Though I never cared for The Beav. Oops, wrong movie. I can’t tell if it’s the meds but are you seeing the same thing I am when you follow that link? Is that a real movie?

Speaking of people being for real… some one stole my yard sign. I put up a sign in my yard in support of the Marriage Amendment North Carolinians will be voting on May 8th and 2 days later it was stolen right from yard. I thought about putting up another yard sing that said “Only assholes steal yard signs” but I don’t want to antagonize the neighbors. I’m still considered the new kid on the block and they already think I’m nuts with the statues and junk.


About Katrina Fernandez

Mackerel Snapping Papist

  • Robwardle

    Arm pictures?

    • Angela Pea

      Zanfeld for the poison ivy.  It’s costly, but it does work on drying up the rash quickly. 

  • Tcn

    Put up the sign anyway. You are nuts. Embrace the goofy and a the weight of the world goes away. Or, most of it, in my experience. ;)

    • The Catholic Science Geek

      I agree…only this time dig a few holes in the yard, fill the holes with cement and then stick the sign in and watch like a hawk until it dries. Once it all settles, reinforce the sign with as much iron as you can, or encase it in a bullet proof glass box. TRY STEALING THAT NE’ER-DO-WELLS!!!

    • Patricia

       We had friends who were repeatedly having signs stolen from their yard during the last election…that is, until they connected a wire with a slight electrical charge to the metal part of the sign.  Ouch. 

      • Karen

        During the Bush/Kerry election, our Bush sign got stolen, so my husband hammered together a really big, wooden frame for the sign, and hammered the posts into the ground…that sucker was there for MONTHS and we left it up after November, too. 

  • AnnF

    Have the drugs kicked in at least?  When Santorum was still in the race, we went to an Ohio fundraiser and came home with a sign, which we proudly planted in the front yard.  Neighbors who never took notice of us before drove by and stared at the crazy people when we were outside, and someone shoveled up a bunch of dog doo from their yard, grass clumps and all, and dumped it on our driveway in the middle of the night.  They left the sign intact, however. 

  • Brbr_kent

    Nice legs!!  :D
    I believe that sexytime is pretty much de rigeur with the shows now; it’s a shame because there is some good programming that I have to shield my eyes from some part of every show.  I watched the entirety of  Rescue Me on Netflix a few months ago and seriously wondered if I needed to confess watching it; that is, putting my own absolute love for the storyline over the obvious lack of expurgation (is that the term?  Even to be funny, does it work??) and thus possible nearness of the occasion of sin?  I dunno.

    Anyhoo, Hope you feel better soon.

  • Katie O’Keefe

    I’d definitely put up the sign.  I haven’t seen Mad Men, but I love your review of it.

  • NY Mom

    Sorry to hear you’ve got poison ivy.  I am so susceptible I made myself a little poison ivy kit that I use as soon as I realize I’ve got it.  I don’t even have to go outside to get it – all I have to do is handle someone’s sneakers or laundry and I can pick up the oils there.

    The most effective OTC treatment I’ve found is something called Domeboro, a powdered astringent.  Make it up according to the package and use it as a soak or compress. It really does soothe the pain (contact with that danged urushiol oil is considered a chemical burn) and if you keep it up several times a day it will help dry up the rash. 

    Hopefully you won’t need Prednisone (my last poison ivy experience netted me a month-long prescription, it was so bad) but if you do, it works pretty quickly.

    Also, get yourself the largest bottle of Technu you can find and keep it handy.


  • Patricia

    Sorry about the poison ivy.  Ack.  We have a child who is very allergic…all she has to do is look at it & she breaks out all over.  We have hope that she is growing out of it…or at least that she tends not to roll around in it as much as she get older.  We’ve found that a spray called Rhus-Tox (has a eucalyptus scent) really helps with the itching & with drying it up.  Good luck & God bless!

  • Mary Alexander

    You need prednisone. Which also can cause psychotic symptoms so this should be fun.

    • Katrina Fernandez

      Side effects include; disconnect with reality, inappropriate happiness [???],  extreme changes in mood, and bulging eyes. 

      Sounds like a hoot.  

  • Manny

    Oh feel better.  That sounds horrible and I wouldn’t consider it wussy to go to the doctor for that.  Best to you.

  • Mamamayerle

    I wanted to like Mad Men. I tried to like Mad Men, but I just couldn’t. Love the concept and the costuming, but could not get past the pervasive sex and gloominess of it all.

  • Kristen InDallas

    Put your next sign in ontop of a weight sensor attached to buzzer/flashing lights.  :)

  • Christine Hebert

    Sorry to hear about the poison Ivy. 
    I have lived in my home since 1991.  I am STILL considered new to the neighborhood….

  • Janet Butler

    Remember, we live in the Ultimate Tolerant Society…I like the idea of electrifying the next yard sign, actually. Maybe getting zapped a couple of times will stir the gray matter in those people to life…. :-)

  • nbwooden

    Put up the sign and make sure to adorn it with some poison ivy. They’ll think twice about stealing the sign.  

  • doughboy

    lol @karen.  that sucks about the poison ivy.  i have not seen mad men, but went to mizzou at the same time as the star of the show :)   he’s aging pretty well.  i can’t even watch sitcoms anymore … everything is sex sex sex.  if it’s not on PBS or EWTN, chances are i have not seen it.  this is why i love  blockbuster.

    • tj.nelson

      I’m so sure.

      • doughboy

        the haters be hatin’

        • tj.nelson


  • Ron

    As for the posion ivy, I had it years ago. My uncle brought me a bar of lye soap. I used it and it turned my skin into reptile scales BUT the itching stopped fast. I’m confident there are other less medieval cures today. As for Mad Men…never watch it. I’m like you these kinds of shows creep me out. Take care of yourself!! Praying for you!! Your blog rocks!!

  • Mimi

    I am so allergic to Poison Oak (our version) I very much feel your pain. I’m so, so, so sorry. Prayers. 

  • Modern Comments

    Wish I had some pithy, witty comment or some sound advice on treating poison ivy (something, mercifully) I’ve never had.  Just get better and know you have my prayers!

  • Karen

    As near as I can tell, nature is just God’s way of telling me I should stay inside. Every time I venture out there to do yardwork (re: weeding) I end up having a spanking brand-new allergic reaction to whatever weed I have yanked out of the ground. 

  • RichFader

    Yes, it’s a real movie. I remember the headlines when they announced the casting: “Mel and Jodie reunite for Beaver”.

  • Seraphic

    Poor you! I feel for you in your itchy plight.