Dear Corolla, a eulogy…

… You faithfully served me well. Eight years you & I traveled along the southern and eastern part of this great country slaughtering whole menageries of animals; squirrels, raccoon, opossums, Canadian geese, frogs, snakes, and rabbits. If it was nocturnal and in the road it didn’t stand a chance under your blood thirsty hellish wheels. Good times. Good times.

For 215,000 miles you carried me wherever I desired to go. Your sturdy frame protected me from harm in 5 accidents and you never once complained when I pushed you well beyond the legal speed limit. You bore the brunt of my road rage without complaint and I will sincerely miss you. You were a good car. The best I’d ever had.

Corolla, may you rest in greener pastures where the road is free of pot holes, stop signs, and malevolent traffic cops. May your body go on to provide good works for others in need. And know, while I cruise about Charlotte causing mayhem in my shiny new Honda Civic, you are never far from my thoughts and firmly rooted in my heart.

Amen.

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