A Single Person’s Guide To Having a Fulfilling Love Life, and some other stuff too…

… This past Sunday, I was a call in guest on talk radio’s, The Mess with host Dan Sealana. It was fun. We talked about sex and love. And cats. And nuns?

Listen here

I didn’t know I was going to be asked, straight out of the gate, if I had any romantic song requests. I should have suggested Sir Mix-A-Lot’s, I like Big Butts. I think that song is pretty damn romantic. It celebrates the natural form of the female body, which seems more sincere than a lot of the overly sentimental crap being written today.

But back to the topic on hand. I tend to over prepare for these types of things, so I had all these notes that I didn’t have time to discuss — like tips on how single people can have fulfilling love lives without being in a romantic relationship.

Yes, single people have love lives. And here is how we can make them fulfilling.

1) Let me start by recommending the Angelic Warfare Confraternity.

The Angelic Warfare Confraternity is a supernatural fellowship of men and women bound to one another in love and dedicated to pursuing and promoting chastity together under the powerful patronage of St. Thomas Aquinas and the Blessed Virgin Mary.

2) Love God.


No. Just… No.

No, not in the “Jesus is my boyfriend” kind of way (barf), because if I hear you say this I may react poorly. By poorly, I mean slap you. Jesus isn’t your damn boyfriend. He is the Son of God, the Word made Flesh, who suffered, died, and rose from the dead. What mere boyfriend can do that? Some respect please. I mean, love God in the truest sense, placing Him above all else and seek to live a life pleasing to Him.

3) Love yourself.

Don’t wallow in self pity or beat yourself up over being single. Don’t let people treat you poorly or settle for unhealthy relationships just for sake of having a relationship. Recognize your worth as a God created being. Love and respect yourself.

4) Love others.

Ugh, those annoying others. Trust me, I know.

Sometimes loving others only requires a simple smile, some patience, and a little kindness.

5) Love your family and friends.

A no-brainer, because these are the easiest ones to love. Well sometimes. Or maybe not at all. Maybe your family is difficult and you loathe holidays and family functions with the white hot passion of a thousand burning heretics. It happens. Deal with it. Love them (See #4).

6) Be joyful.

Be joy. Exude joy. Do what makes you joyful and promotes joy in your heart. Because joy is infectious.

7) Promote marriage.

You don’t have to be married to promote and support marriage. I love marriage and I love my married friends. It makes me feel good that I can be there for them if needed. I like to watch their kids so they can have a much deserved date night. I like to listen to their “how we met” stories. I just like being around married people.

Chances are, single or not, there is someone in your life right now who could use some lovin’. Go love them, as Christ commanded. Being married isn’t a cure from loneliness or an excuse to love no one else but your spouse and kids. Now go on, and love them all.

About Katrina Fernandez

Mackerel Snapping Papist

  • Donna Gunter

    Thanks Kat for the link to the Angelic Warfare Confraternity. I had never heard of it.

    • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/thecrescat Katrina Fernandez

      I got to see the enrollment of a large group when I was in Seattle. The ceremony was quite moving. I think St. Ann’s has group enrollment too. I bet St. Tom’s does too since Kauth and Reid are pretty tight.

      • Mark.

        So tempting. I think I’ll try seeing if I can do the daily prayers for a month before I send for the sacramentals and bother the Dominicans in Miami (100 miles). Never heard of it either: thanks.

  • Greg

    The song is called “Baby Got Back,” ftr.

  • Quittin’ time at Tara!

    My Lord, that pic of hugging Jesus needs to be removed from my brain. Somehow. Don’t care if it takes a fifth of gin and a shrimp fork. Get it OUT.

    I wish he could have kept you on longer and didn’t talk so much himself. That happens a lot in radio.

  • hotboogers

    I’m sorry, that Fr. Jonathan is just way too good-looking for me. I can’t hear what he’s saying because he’s so beautiful. What must God be thinking … sigh …Oh wait! I see what you did there!


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