Goals for 2016 aka Lists I make when Procrastinating.

Goals for 2016 aka Lists I make when Procrastinating. 

1. Buy my husband a boat for Father’s Day. My husband has been through hell and back for the last 3 or 4 years and he has always supported me and loved me even when he was so down that he didn’t love himself. He has come back from the worst place that a man could be after losing both his parents, his grandmother and his best friend all within 3 years. He wants a boat. So I wanna get him a boat. A used boat that is affordable and works.

2. Learn how to pray the Divine Office. I should probably start just making a habit of praying better. I really suck at praying. I usually just talk to God all day long as things come up. I complain, beg, plea, bargain… kind of like the stages of grief. I pretty much grieve all day, every day.

3. Daily Mass, I love daily Mass to the Max and my life is so much more peaceful and I’m a lot less snarky when I make the time to go. My kids are in school all day, so I can do it. I just have to scratch up the will to live and put pants on to get out the door. Nobody needs that quiet time with Jesus as much as me. I am just gonna add: go to Adoration, here because I need to do that more often also.

4. Try to be less snarky. {My angel just snorted} I hate being snarky. Mostly because it makes people not like me and there is a part of me that is still a 5 year old who cares about that kind of thing. But damn, there are just times when people are on my last nerve and snark just pours out. I don’t know how to stop it or even if I should, because if I don’t say these things, who will? We Catholics like to pretend we have our shit together, but we don’t, that’s why we keep ending up in the confession line. I will keep confessing it and ya’ll keep praying for me.

5. Make time for my kids. My youngest child is 14. Making “time” for them is a lot harder now that they are older. It’s not just sitting with them as they play on the floor or keep them from killing each other. No, now “time” means movies, long talks, meeting them at bars (my oldest is 21) and just listening to them and their lives. It means actually getting to know the people they are at this moment and then doing it all over again in a week when they change. Young adults are always changing.

6. Just appreciate my time. I’m almost 40. Time is going faster just as I am beginning to understand how precious each moment is. Each baby smile, each kid’s accomplishments, each kid’s heartbreaks, each new person they bring around, each happy moment, each tragic moment, they are all passing by so fast. So fast that I can’t catch them if I’m trying to keep up with all the bad news and drama on Facebook and Twitter. This is a hard balance because I have to stay aware, but I can’t afford to spend time arguing with people who won’t change my mind, nor I theirs. My life will not wait for me to look up for the screen, it will just pass me by.

7. Dance more. I love dancing. LOVE IT! I have danced on speakers, on dance floors, on tables and in my kitchen. I dance everywhere. It’s my thing. I stopped dancing when life got insane. I don’t know why, I just did. I also gained 70 pounds and became a hermit. I don’t have very many friends that I hang out with and I stare out my window like a sad version of myself. A very sad one. The first step in getting over it is to dance. That’s all I can think of. I thank the binge watching of Grey’s Anatomy for that revelation.