Boy Parts vs. Girl Parts–More on Gender and Justice

All right, I know what you thought I was going to write on. . . but. . .On Thursday, Kai-Kai called me at 5:30 with the great news, “Ren got Little Jake!”  Little Jake is Annie (in Annie Get Your Gun)’s little brother.  It’s probably the best role he, as a 6th grader, could have gotten.”Wow!” I said.  “What did you get?””Frieda, Wilson’s wife, it’s an OK part, but Ren got Little Jake!”Later, when they got home, Ren was exultant…. Read more

Mike Chang, Glee and The Asian “F”

Tonight was a good night for Asian-Americans and Gleeks. Thousands of us heaved a big sigh as Mike Chang, played by Harry Shum Jr., aka as “The Asian Guy”  finally not only got his own story line, but sang two whole solos including the whole song “Cool” from West Side Story–one of my most favorite songs!Boy, boy, crazy boy, Get cool, boy! Got a rocket in your pocket, Keep coolly cool, boy! I admit it, my whole life I’ve always looked out for whatever… Read more

Toilet Paper Distribution, or how Equality and Justice aren’t the Same Thing

At our church, once a month, I get to serve on the set-up team.  One of the most important tasks for set-up is examining the toilet paper in the ladies room. When Kathy (a brilliant financial analyst with graduate degrees) trained me in toilet paper inspection, I was amazed at the thoroughness with which she had thought through this challenge.  In each stall, a large industrial toilet paper dispenser sits attached to the wall and holds 2 rolls of toilet… Read more

The Chinese Problem with Hugs

I am not a touchy sort of person.  Physical affection is most definitely NOT one of my languages of love.As with so many things, I blame this all on being Chinese.In my family, we didn’t really hug, kiss or say “I love you.”  That was the American way of showing love, like the Brady bunch or the Cosby family.  I didn’t think there was anything strange because growing up in very Asian Hawaii, most of my friend’s families seemed even… Read more

A Guest Blog by Kai-Kai: My Agitating Kinfolks

 For the first time ever, I’m featuring a guest blogger, my daughter Kai-Kai, who wrote this essay based on “The Outsiders” for school.  I thought it was hilarious and an apt picture of our family.  I also don’t remember the chicken drumstick incident.  Enjoy!            My Agitating KinfolkMany times in life, humans encounter events that they believe unfair, bothersome, and angering. I have felt this way many times in my life. One of the main conflicts in… Read more

Fierce Conversations

Back in February, I borrowed Fierce Conversations, written by Susan Scott,  from my friends Jeff and Tara.  They used the book at their church’s marriage retreat, and to prepare, had engaged in their own fierce conversation about their marriage.  Because I’m Jeff’s supervisor as well as friend, they sent me their notes from their conversation. Whew!And “Whew!” was what folks at their retreat said as well after they shared from their experience. A week ago, I went through books on my shelf… Read more

Real Leaders, Real Bosses, Failure Parents

Dad, as we drive to church while I’m ripping the kids for not cleaning the kitchen the night before:  If you grow up and don’t meet your expectations at work, you get fired.Kid:  At work they have real leaders and people that actually care about you–unlike you two.Ouch.Of course, this statement was so ludicrous on so many levels that the 4 other members of the family burst into laughter and laughed the rest of the way to church.  A good… Read more

Sports Mama. . . Not

In so many movies and novels, a wounded, emotionally-stunted protagonist (maybe even a serial killer) tearfully blurts out, “My father never came to one of my games. . .”  The implication being that not attending one’s kids’ sports events is at the very least child neglect and at the most child abuse. Guilty.I can’t believe it!  There’s even jewelryfor the moms I’m not!In 15 years of parenting, I’ve managed to miss the vast majority of kid soccer, softball, baseball, swimming… Read more

Annie, Shoot your Gun Already!

SPOILER ALERT!  Don’t read if you don’t want to know what happens at the end of Annie get Your Gun!”That’s the worst movie I’ve ever seen,” Ling announced after we watched Annie Get your Gun, the Irving Berlin musical about Annie Oakley, a sharpshooter with the Buffalo Bill Wild West show.Today, Kai and Ren auditioned for the play, so we watched the movie as part of their research. It’s a fun story.  Annie Oakley, a spunky, illiterate hick gets discovered when… Read more

Parenthood

Last week, the whole family watched the movie Parenthood to celebrate Labor Day Eve.Friends recently saw it and raved.  So when I noticed it was a a streaming video on Netflix, and remembered that the last time I watched the movie I was not a parent (in fact, I hadn’t even met Scott), I thought it would be a good chance for Scott and I to laugh and commiserate.Problem #1, the movie’s rated PG-13, and we have an 11 year old. Problem… Read more

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