St. Patrick Resigns As Patron Saint Of Ireland

(AoftheANews) AoftheANews has learned that St. Patrick has officially resigned as patron saint of Ireland, as a direct result of the national referendum held on May 23, where so-called same sex marriage was overwhelmingly approved. According to a spokesman for St Patrick, God accepted his resignation late Sunday afternoon.

“It is with deep regret that I hereby officially tender my resignation as patron saint of the once-Catholic nation of Ireland,” the sainted bishop’s letter began, “as it appears my intervention and patronage are neither needed nor appreciated – if it be your almighty and sovereign will.”

The letter closes with the line: “Alas, it would seem that the snakes have returned, and have driven me from the Emerald Isle. So be it.”

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