Without Women, We Miss the Gospel

Without Women, We Miss the Gospel November 26, 2020

As a content creator, I don’t typically consume my own stuff for the sake of enjoyment. I’m not that narcissistic. Instead, what generally happens is that I read or listen back because I’m trying to improve my game. When I read my books, it’s not for pleasure; it’s to try to pick out all the inevitable typos that come with book-authoring. However, yesterday was a different story.

On Tuesday, November 24, a new episode of the Heretic Happy Hour podcast released, and guest-featured the one and only Brenda Marie Davies of the God is Grey YouTube channel. I decided to give it a listen during my hour-long bike ride, and my focus was to just listen to it as a fan of the show – not as one of its 4 hosts, but simply as a listener. And I’m so glad that I did.


Well, because it’s actually really, really good. But more than that! I was able to hear from two women whom I greatly respect: Dr. Rev. Katy Valentine (a fellow co-host) and the aforementioned Brenda Marie Davies.

A bit of context for this particular episode: We are doing a 4-part series on what reconstruction means to each host. In this installment, it was Katy’s turn, and she talked about why the term “Christian” is still important to her. For my episode, which will come out sometime in December, I’ll be talking about why that term isn’t something I think about. So, needless to say, Katy and I are on different pages. And that’s okay! Let me rephrase: It is championed. In fact, peaceful disagreement is a staple of the podcast, which is one reason it has gained so much global popularity.

Anyway, when we interviewed Brenda, we talked about why some people label her a “heretic,” and then got into how she is a sex-positive Christian who champions the LGBTQ+ community. Amazing, right?! Well, it was. She was! Which brings me to why I’m writing this article.

Christians, please hear this!!!


This may not come as a surprise to those of you who regularly follow authors here on the Patheos Progressive Channel, but I still feel it needs to be said. I shouldn’t have to say it because it’s so duh-worthy, but alas, here we are.

For reasons I cannot grasp, there a whole hosts of Christians out there – complementarians, as they’re called – who think that preachers and teachers must have a penis. Apparently, having one of these dangling from one’s nether regions is something the God of the infinite cosmos requires in order to preach the “good news” to the world.


Now, I know what some of you THINK the Bible clearly-seyyyyyyyz about this matter, but that has been clearly debunked by a bunch of people. In fact, I think I’ve done a decent job commenting on the passages complementarians use to argue in favor of their penis-only pulpit policy. Nevertheless, even if we’re wrong, even if the New Testament passages in question really do forbid women from being pastors, Jesus allowed women to teach and preach. In fact, the first person who taught others (read: men) about the Risen Christ was a woman. So, without a woman, we wouldn’t have knowledge of the most important event in Christian history.

Chew on that, suckers!!!

This is one of those (non)-issues that I can’t believe we’re still discussing. It’s like the LGBTQ+ topic. You’d think, with a God so big and a cosmos that seems to be infinite, perhaps even containing multiple universes, that the divine wouldn’t have to do a cup check before someone steps on stage to teach. That should be the least of her concern. But hey: Insecure men still have the right to voice their opinions, I guess.

As for me, however, I’m just gonna give thanks that I know so many amazing women who can guide me toward a better understanding of the divine and what it means to be a human being. Women like Brenda Marie Davies. Dr. Rev. Katy Valentine. Michelle Collins. Jory Micah. Amanda Iosa. My wife Lyndsay and daughter Elyse. My mother, Sharon. My grandmother, Betty (Rest in Peace, you beautiful Nonna). And so many others I didn’t mention by name. I’m thankful for all of you.

Peace and love. And keep breaking that glass steeple!

If you wanna get to know me better, please follow me on social media. I’m pretty active on all platforms:





About Matthew J. Distefano
Matthew is a best-selling author, blogger, podcaster, long-time social worker, and hip-hop artist. He is an outspoken advocate for nonviolence, happily married, with one daughter. Outside of writing, his interests include gardening, hiking, and European football. He lives in Northern California You can read more about the author here.
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