10 Things Christians Are More Hyped About Than Jesus

I grew up in your typical large, conservative Evangelical Church. I spent a decade playing a variety of instruments in a variety of different worship teams. I attended retreats and conferences. I helped lead Bible studies and prayer groups. I did the damn thing. So, suffice it to say, I know my way around a church.

One thing I learned about most Christians is that it took a lot of effort to get them to care. Sermons were constantly infused with motivational speeches. Texts on hell and punishment were often used as a way to jolt people out of their pews. Heck, our college group even based their name on Ephesians 5:14 and called it “The Awakening” with the tagline, “Wake up, O Sleeper!”

So, when I see conservative Christians jacked for all these things that have nothing to do with Jesus, I’m perplexed. It makes me think that it’s not their personality that’s the problem; it’s that they don’t actually care about Jesus, the Gospel, the Bible, God, salvation, hell, the end times, atonement – any of it!

And look, I’m not one to judge the hearts of people. I honestly don’t care if people give their lives to Jesus. I don’t care if people read the Bible. It just feels rather odd to me that they spent so much time trying to motivate all of us to follow Christ, when what they really wanted were the following 10 things.

Donald Trump
QAnon
Anti-Vaccine Pseudoscience
Anti-CRT Propaganda
Claims of Election Fraud
Joe Rogan
Guns
Outrage at Liberals
Calling Everything They Don’t Like “Socialism”
Her Emails

I am certain there are more, but that probably covers what conservative Evangelicals are posting about on Twitter 99% of the time. I would know; I visited too many of their sites to name in order to come up with this list. And now I’m gonna go take a shower because I feel gross.

Later.

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