Loneliness In The Age Of Facebook: We Have Hundreds Of “Friends,” Why Do We Feel So Alone?

… “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

If we never risk being vulnerable, we’re never going to experience being loved. We’re given this illusion of being heard and accepted, lending us the false perception of feeling connected. But this is not meeting our innate, biological need for true acceptance and touch from someone who knows you, and accepts the real you, as opposed to this idealistic falsified image of you.

So then, in light of this information, what do we do?

Choose Vulnerability

We choose between fearing and risking, performing and truly living, embracing a time of controlled loneliness and being content with the mundane. And here’s where the beauty of the Gospel comes in: It gives us permission to be imperfect, to be vulnerable, to simply embrace who we truly are and that we are accepted as we are.

Being vulnerable and risking connection is not so much of a risk that you might get hurt someday, it’s a guarantee that you will get hurt. Sociologist and researcher Sherry Turkle says so well, “Who said that a life without conflict, without dealing with the past, or without rubbing up against the troublesome people is better?”

A life without problems might be safer, but it’s not better than experiencing the fruit of allowing yourself to be seen in the light.

When you step onto the messy battlefield of relationships, you’re going to get hit. Some hits will be worse than others, and some hits will take longer to recover from, but after each hit, you’re going to get up. Why? Because in the choice between loneliness and connection, we all ultimately want connection.

I wrote this in 2014 and it was published in Relevant Magazine. I’ll be back on Friday with some new content; feel free to check back in then and head over to my Facebook Page to give it a like! Until then, happy Valentine’s Day!

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[the image is a screenshot from Relevant Magazine]