Some marital stress is inevitable; every relationship has its share of challenges that come from sharing life with another imperfect person. However, unaddressed stress over the long term is not just annoying—it is what eventually leads to marital burnout. So make sure your marriage isn’t starved of time and attention. And evaluate the pressures on your marriage and find ways to lighten the load where possible. Read more
What if we prepared our hearts for Thanksgiving in a slightly different way this year? What if we thanked God for all we don’t even know He has done? There are innumerable ways God has protected us that we have never seen. Psalm 91:11 says God commands His angels to guard us! I like the NLT version, which says: “For he will order his angels to protect you wherever you go.” Read more
I’m taking a page from that playbook to look at five ways to stop arguments before they start—phrases we can use to work with, rather than against, our spouse when conflicts arise. I’d recommend you literally stash these as a cheat sheet in your purse, wallet, or some easy-to-grab location, and then use them liberally in the heat of the moment. Read more
While most women do still earn less on average than men (Pew Research reports that women’s annual earnings were 82% of men’s earnings in 2019), young women earn as much or more than young men in 22 U.S. metro areas. Another Pew study found that the number of women who earn significantly more than their husbands has roughly tripled in the last 50 years from 5% to 16%. That fits with what we saw in our recent study for Thriving in Love & Money. Read more
Despite what it looks like, we’re not as divided as we think. It’s not even close. Yet, since America seems so fractured, Christians have an incredible opportunity to be difference-makers: people who are catalysts for peace instead of division, people whose relationships reflect health instead of toxicity, people who, hopefully, look like Jesus and can draw others to Him. Read more
Having a better perspective on the issues—and the sanity and “normalcy” of the people we disagree with—won’t make our preferred candidates win. It won’t solve the dysfunction that we see in some of our government institutions. But it will allow us to be people who stop contributing to the problem and start contributing to the solution. It will provide a start to being people who can build bridges and represent our faith well in the public arena. Knowing we are closer than we think is simply an entry point to the greater goal: a way to help heal the fractures and become closer as a society again. Read more
October has long been a bittersweet month for me. As Breast Cancer Awareness month, it’s full of reminders to get mammograms, acknowledgements of life-giving medical advances, and celebrations of breast cancer survivors like Shaunti, and probably many of you. Yet, October is also my reminder that not every earthly battle against breast cancer is won. Not everyone rings the bell when they complete chemo. Not everyone hears the words, “You are in remission.” Read more
Celebrating your wife’s big accomplishments is important, but so is cheering her on in the everydayness of life. Express gratitude for the unseen things she does such as laundry, changing diapers, taking care of sick kids or pets, and volunteering in the concession stand—all possibly while working long hours to complete her big work project. Your encouragement can be as simple as leaving a note on the bathroom mirror that says, “Thank you for being a great wife.” Or reaching for her hand at the end of a long day and pulling her into a big hug. Read more
According to 2023 data from the Hartford Institute for Religion Research, more than half (53%) of pastors have seriously considered leaving pastoral ministry at least once since 2020. Jeff and I were conducting research at a recent retreat for about 1,700 senior pastors and their spouses, and multiple attendees provided confidential thoughts for this blog. So here are 5 things your pastor wishes you knew—paired with doable steps you can take to tend to your pastor’s heart all year long. Read more
This is part 2 of a two-part series on the mental wellbeing of college students. Last week my Executive Assistant, Amy Masaschi, wrote about her son’s anxiety and depression at the start of his college career. This week, I’ll offer several steps to help parents navigate the college years in a supportive way. Read more
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