In the interest of sharing a personal and ministry update, I wanted to let you know that the next few months are going to be an interesting season for Jeff and me. I’m going to go into what my staff jokingly refers to as “Cave Mode.” Here’s the thing: Jeff and I are finishing up two years of research for our next book – but we’re quite behind on the actual book deadline. This is in part due to the... Read more
Unless you’re in counterterrorism, nothing good comes from keeping secrets from those you care about. And believe it or not, a recent and infamous business debacle has a big lesson on the four most dangerous ways we try to hide things—even in our marriages. For several years, I’ve followed the story of Theranos, the company helmed by media darling Elizabeth Holmes. This twenty-something genius was transforming the medical industry by creating (she claimed) a revolutionary technology that could test... Read more
I know what it’s like to take a daughter to college, and it’s not easy. So when a man shared this story with me, I could understand why his wife was acting the way she was. And it wasn’t her that needed to change; it was him. After they dropped off their daughter for her freshman year of college, they intended to add a few days on to their drive home and do some sightseeing now that it was just... Read more
When your husband approaches you for sex, it goes beyond a need for a physical release or a desire for pleasure. There are emotions under the surface, emotions that you might not realize are very powerful. Keep reading to learn more. Read more
My Thoughts on “Toxic Masculinity”: A Series Part 1: “Toxic Masculinity” or an Attack on Masculinity? Last week I posted a brief piece in response to two hot-button items generating a firestorm of controversy: a Gillette ad with the #MeToo-era challenge “Is this the best a man can get?”, and the American Psychological Association’s (APA) new Guidelines for Psychological Practice with Boys and Men. This is the more in-depth look I promised. In fact, there are so many important angles... Read more
It seems like we’re being bombarded on a daily basis with suggestive images everywhere we turn—TV commercials, magazine ads, mainstream websites, and online marketing. It’s hard to even watch a TV show without being confronted with images that border on pornography. One time, when a friend was watching TV with her husband and a Victoria’s Secret commercial came on, he said “I really shouldn’t be watching this”—and she blocked his view. Since then, whenever a commercial like that comes on... Read more
I’ve been contacted by a lot of readers and those in the media asking for my opinion on the American Psychological Association’s new guidelines for the Psychological Practice with Boys and Men—especially given the controversy surrounding its use of the phrase “toxic masculinity.” I’m sure many of you have seen the Gillette ad surrounding this hot topic (click here to view it). Given how much chatter there’s been over it (both positive and negative) in the media over the last... Read more
Welcome to a new year! I can’t believe it’s 2019 already! I know everyone’s kids are going back to school (including mine) and we’re settling back in to work and home routines. There’s something so great about a fresh start, isn’t there? New calendars. New goals, new projects. I want to share something I am doing this year, in case any of you want to take up this challenge as well. Now let’s acknowledge that to some degree, a new... Read more
Every day, our men wake up and head out to “conquer” the world. Or, rather, the worlds of work, finances, home, school, kids’ activities, sports… We think we understand that, right? Turns out, we don’t. Not quite. Because in his mind, it isn’t about “juggling” everything. Instead, every one of those spheres have a very, very specific set of expectations of him. Expectations that he is desperately trying to meet. And at a deep level, he doubts that he is... Read more
From all of us here – from Shaunti and Jeff, their core team, and the the whole crew of writers, researchers, and advisors – we wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Sincerely, Shaunti, Jeff, and their team Core team from right: Eileen, Charlyn, Katie, Shaunti, Caroline (in Atlanta) and Naomi (photoshopped in from Oregon) Read more
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