Live-Tweeting the Genuine Feminine Conference!

The Ogre signed me up for the Genuine Feminine conference this weekend. When he told me, I was all

Then he said, “you need to get out of the house! It’ll make you feel better!” and I was like

That same night, I checked my blog email for the first time in about a month, just to see if anyone was feeling so sorry for me being blue that they actually sent me an email. (They weren’t, except GeekLady, because she’s the best ever. The rest of you suck. Just kidding. A little.) But there was this one email from the Genuine Feminine peeps, asking me to SPEAK at their CONFERENCE.

I couldn’t believe it. No one’s ever asked me to speak at anything before! I mean, I had no idea what kind of coherent contribution I would be expected to make, since it’s unlikely that I could bring my laptop and communicate through GIFs and they probably didn’t want me swearing, which basically eliminates all my forms of communication, but still! They like me! They really like me! I told the Ogre and we were like

till I noticed the date of the email, four days previous. Then I asked the Ogre when the conference started and he checked the website and was all

So I had to write an email apologizing like an adult for my childish refusal to responsibly check email and be all

They had already filled the slot with Dr. Catherine Pakuluk, who I’ve never heard swear and who is 1000% more coherent than I am, so I think it was a win-win for everyone.

Except me.

But I did go to the kick-off talk last night by the editor of Verily magazine, Ashley Crouch, and it was

I’m pretty sure it’s because her speech was laced with Platonic imagery and she’s a fellow UD alum (BECAUSE UD IS THE BEST EVER!!!!), but it was the first time I’ve listened to someone talk about fashion and not wanted to shove red-hot pokers through my ears to stop the awful.

Actually, it was so awesome that I wanted to find her afterward like a total creeper and beg for her notes so I could blog about it, but lots of people were asking questions, and there was a pub just next door. So I was like

I was so pumped about the conference I initially rolled my eyes about, though, that I decided at 10 pm last night to live-tweet it.

Like, today. Or right now, rather. I mean, the continental breakfast started half an hour ago, and I still have to publish this post, shower, and frantically facebook message Brandon Vogt and ask him how to live-tweet things.

Come over to Twitter and watch this train wreck unfold! I can’t promise not to swear, either.