Over the years, I’ve made resolutions. They include the usuals like losing weight, reading books, and praying more. Some years, I succeeded, other years I failed within a day.
Writing wise, I’ve written goals like getting published once a week, writing a book, and being part of the book festival –all of which I’ve made –but also had years where I didn’t. The challenges of resolutions indicate to me that experience of success is no guarantee of success, (writing goals) and consistent failure doesn’t seem to dim my hope (weight).
So this year, the goals are different. One goal is to become nationally certified in teaching, and to get certified in English as a Second Language.
Another is to be published outside of my blog, once a month.
A third is to get in better health –not losing weight, just being healthier –less diet coke and more water, less sugar, less fat. Last year, I made a health goal a week and it helped. I made appointments, I kept them. This year, it’s just a building on last year’s.
My fourth goal is to be connected more deeply with my family –my extended family. Mom’s made that a priority with her death. We’re hoping to zoom once a week as part of this, and it will help all of us with the loss.
Finally, my fifth goal is reading. Last year, I pledged one book a month, and I read more than twelve, but not at the pace I planned.
Books read this year include the Midnight Library, Against the Currant, Thursday Night Murder Club, Swamp Story, Circe, On Writing, Oh Great One! and I know there are more but I’ve forgotten. What I do know, is it was a pleasure to read again, something which radiation, chemo and exhaustion had burned away for a while.
Writing also took it on the chin this year, both publication and generation wise. I’m working to correct it. As I read about teaching and what an accomplished educator does, it’s a reminder that in life, we can get to the point of being so busy we do not reflect on how to become better at who we are and what we do and why we do it.
So what are the other five resolutions? I mean I’ve done health, reading, writing, connection with family and getting certified. What else? Organizing –I’m cleaning out the piles that have become invisible in plain sight. Sixth goal -decluttering, just a little every day.
Seventh goal? Prayer. Not that it’s seventh in priorities, just seventh in this list. I have my copy of the Magnificat, and plan to go to adoration regularly and my mother’s rosary. It’s in the works.
Eighth goal: Date night –once a week. Because every day is a gift and back when I got cancer, my husband declared we’d make each day the most romantic ever –and we’re still trying to live that out.
Ninth goal: Piano –to practice regularly, which again, I did start out last year doing, but haven’t kept up with it. It’s going on my list of things to do each day. Part of that is to keep my brain and heart growing and struggling –practice is hard, and remembering that learning is hard is to me, a necessary part of being a teacher.
Tenth goal: Art. I am drawing again, but not posting any of them, because they’re quick sketches. However, I’m doing one a day just to keep the pen/pencil moving.
Why would I give myself ten goals? Because grief likes to eat time, and I intend to pour my grief into life, rather than supsend my life until grief losens its grip.
In the meantime, I’m here, we have a snowday today and tomorrow. I’ll have plenty of time for some of this –and filling out three Fasfas…ugh.
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