This was written by a friend of mine, Sunny Buchanan Ridings. I am sharing for a couple of reasons. First, it’s personally affecting and inspiring. Second, I think it’s a perfect model of the kind of vulnerable transparency we’re called to in the intentional community of Christian faith. Read and learn from her fine example.
RUNNING: MY WHY
I’m sure people have all different reasons for running. In part, I wanted to see what all the fuss is about- why friend after friend posts on Facebook their post-run stats. People get up early on weekends VOLUNTARILY to run 5K’s and half marathons and all that jazz.
David and I are in the waiting place on our adoption. We could be matched with a birth mother tomorrow- or it might be six months. There is noting we can do to speed up the process- we must simply wait. And waiting aint easy. I noticed early on in the waiting time that sometimes when I am overwhelmed, I shut down. I curl up on the couch- unable to move- paralyzed by the unknown. A wise friend told me to get up and move- to put on the music and dance, or walk around the camp. And it helped- so I decided to step up my game- I decided to run.
And here’s what I’ve found in my two weeks of running (four times- 7 miles total). Running clears the mental cobwebs. Things seem to shift in my brain in a good way. Running is really hard- very physically demanding, especially at my current body weight. Yes, walking would probably be easier on my joints and maybe better for my whole body- but frankly, this journey isn’t about weight loss or my joints- its about my brain. And guess what I’m telling myself while am running? Some of the most positive and loving messages I’ve ever told myself- you CAN do this, you got this, you are strong, you are powerful. That’s important stuff.I’m actually doing a 5K training program- so I warm up and cool down with a brisk walk and in between I do intervals of jogging/ walking. My sore muscles are worth it. My post-run red face and coughing (when I breath cold air) are worth it. Those messages I’m telling myself while I’m running are true- and they apply to more areas of my life.
As a solo pastor (something I said I would NEVER do)- I am strong and powerful. I can do more than I thought I could do- I mean I preach in three churches every Sunday- that’s big.
As a waiting mom- I am strong and powerful and I am getting my house in order. Our home now has a fully furnished amazing nursery ready- but more than that the “house” of my body is in order. My mind is healthier than it has ever been and my body is getting there.
And the endorphins are real, folks. That’s the only reason I can come up with for why I actually look forward to the next run instead of dreading it.
So there you go, bring on the waiting, and bring on the running. I can do this- I’m strong and powerful.