One of the most frustrating things on earth is when you reach into your pocket to pull out your smart phone and realize it’s completely out of power. You remember that you didn’t charge it up, and now, it’s dead. You won’t be able to play Candy Crush or check facebook or text anybody until you find a way to recharge it.
When something is important to us, we need to make sure it stays charged up.
Think about this simple concept in terms of your marriage. If your marriage is important to you, shouldn’t you be intentional about “recharging” it daily? Shouldn’t you make sure you’re doing everything in your power to keep your relationship with your husband or wife powered up at all times?
Most of us would say we want a fully charged, marriage, but we don’t always know how to do it. There’s not a simple instruction manual or a plug attached to your spouse you can just connect into an outlet. No, recharging a marriage requires much more effort than recharging a phone.
Luckily, it’s not as difficult as you may think. Below are ten simple ways you can add a daily dose of energy to your marriage.
In no particular order…
1. Give a foot rub.
This might not sound glamorous, but it’s very helpful. When you’re touching your spouse (and not just sexual touch), it connects you on a physical and emotional level. Your conversations become deeper when you’re touching while you talk. Plus, your spouse will really appreciate the massage!
2. Go to bed at the same time.
This one isn’t always practical, but do it as much as you can. “Pillow Talk” makes for some of a couple’s most intimate conversations, plus there a lot more than talking you can do together in the bedroom! For more marriage-building bedroom activities, check out our new video series, “Best Sex Life Now,” by clicking here.
3. Outlaw criticism.
I’m convinced that criticism (which can sometimes manifest itself in sarcasm) is one of the leading causes of marriage breakdowns. Your words have power to build up or to tear down. Your spouse needs you to be his/her biggest encourager; not their biggest critic!
4. Digital detox.
As much as you can, turn off off your phones when you’re around each other. Also, have some time together daily (even if it’s only fifteen minutes or so) with no TV or distractions of any kind. Just talk. Enjoy each other free from all the noise of the outside world.
5. Flirt throughout the day.Foreplay is an all-day event! Every chance you get, give your spouse a call or send a flirtatious text message. Let them know they’re one your mind all day. For more on this, check out this popular post on 5 ways to improve your marriage using your smart phone..
6. Find some good “couple friends.”
Don’t just have “his friends” and “her friends.” Find some couples who have healthy marriages, strong values and fun personalities and enjoy time together with them. We end up becoming like the people we hang around the most.
7. Listen (don’t just pretend to be listening).
Most of us are pretty good at giving the minimum amount of focus required to make our spouse think we’re really listening. Instead, give your spouse your full, focused attention. We communicate our love by our listening even more than we do by our words.
This one might freak some of you out, but I believe prayer is one of the most intimate acts a couple can share. End your day by holding hands and thanking God for each other (out loud) and asking Him to guide your steps. A marriage built on a foundation of faith is a strong marriage.
Laughter should be the soundtrack of your life. Never laugh at each other, but always laugh with each other! Don’t take yourself too seriously or your marriage too lightly.
Never think you’ve got it all figured out. Keep learning and growing together. For some resources to help you keep learning and growing, check out my bestselling book “iVow: Secrets to a Stronger Marriage” which is now also available on iTunes as an ebook download on iPhones, iPads and all Apple devices by clicking here.
You can also check out our FREE video series on “The 4 Pillars of a Strong Marriage” by clicking here and for daily, marriage-building encouragement, please connect with me on twitter.
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