Everyday, my wife Ashley and I receive messages through our blogs, Facebook pages, our website and even in person. MANY of these questions have to do with sex. We certainly don’t claim to be “gurus” (if such a thing exists) about marriage and sex, but we’re honored to be part of the conversation and share what we’ve learned through the Bible’s timeless wisdom, modern research and our own interactions with thousands of couples.
These are answers to nine of the most common questions we’ve received about sex. In no particular order:
1. What’s “okay” and what (if anything) should be “off limits” in the bedroom?
Our most popular video lesson in the “Best Sex Life Now” video series addresses this specific question in detail. The “50 Shades of Grey” phenomenon has fueled a lot of questions about what’s healthy and what (if anything) should be off limits. There is certainly a lot of freedom and creativity two spouses should enjoy in the bedroom but things that are destructive and harmful include: Anything that makes one or both spouse’s uncomfortable, anything physically dangerous to one or both spouses and bringing another person into the bedroom (virtually or physically).
Healthy sexual intimacy is built on a foundation of monogamy and mutual respect. With that being said, we also believe that God intends sex to be FUN and adventurous within the covenant of a committed marriage. Don’t feel like you can’t try new things together. If sex isn’t fun and exciting, then you’re doing something wrong! With that being said, don’t try to coerce or pressure your spouse into performing acts he/she isn’t comfortable doing.
2. Is pornography okay to use if we watch it together?