The Delicate Balance

As I mentioned last week, I have now begun my 20 hrs. a week at home/20 hrs. a week working in my transition to part-time InterVarsity Staff.

So far, so good with all the myriad of snafu’s you can imagine.

Last week, when I had an all day meeting in Grand Rapids I remembered to bring the breast pump ~ hurrah!

Unfortunately, I forgot to bring enough bottles to pump the milk into, and kept having to wash them over & over again.  I also forgot once and skipped a session.  Not good for milk production.

Today, I had an all day meeting in Battle Creek at a Panera.  This time I remember the pump, but forgot several things: enough bottles to pump into, the carrying case for pumped milk, the freezer packs & something to clean them with for multiple pumping sessions.

Also, I sent Rhys to daycare with nothing but the clothes on his back. ay ay ay.  It is scatterbrain city over here.

Once I expressed the milk the first time I realized the issue.  The water in the woman’s bathroom was ice cold and I was using hand soap to clean it all on nasty, unsanitized sink surfaces.  Then, there was no paper towels so I had to use toilet paper to dry it all –yuck.

Fortunately, it is butt cold here in MI, so the expressed milk did fine in the car.

Funny thing is, I fed Rhys at 1am this morning.  As I turned over and expected to fall dreamily back to sleep I remembered one terrible fact:

I left the freaking breast milk in my Mama Medala case, (without the carrying case or frozen packs) in our office –for the last 8 hours!  All that work for nothing.  All of that unrefridgerated breast milk, gone to waste. Arrrghghgh.

It’s been over 3 years since I’ve had to think about all this when I was working full-time while my 1st born, Ransom was nursing.

I am, however, committed to making this work.  When Ran was little I pumped in airports, in McDonalds bathrooms, all over campus, in the car in the winter, on floors of conference centers –where ever I could get the job done.  I also breastfed Ransom in all of those places and dragged him cross country with me on IV trips.  It was glorious.

I must pump now if I want to do the same with Rhys.  In fact, he’s going to be joining me for a conference in Atlanta in early March.

Of all of the things about having a very young infant, breastfeeding is what I love the most.  (parent directed breastfeeding might I add).   I cherish that time and if I have to pump to make it keep working, by golly that is what I’m going to do.

Eventually, I’ll remember to bring everything “Mama Madela” requires of me. 🙂