“NOW AND AT THE HOUR.” Finished the final section of the rough draft of my latest short story. Since it’s been over a week since I posted the last chunk, I suggest just starting at the beginning, but if you just want the last section it’s here.

This is what the story’s about: “I hadn’t been expecting to come back to life. I think I’d seen a quick segment about revival on the evening news, or maybe glanced through a magazine article in the checkout line. But I certainly didn’t know it was covered by our insurance; it was still very exotic at the time. We were among the first thousand people to be revived. Even today, you still spend three days brain-dead before revival. I suspect they could cut it down, but I think people like the religious symbolism–I think it helps them believe revival will work. The price has come down significantly, though, and it’s covered by the state insurance plans. It’s cheap enough now that even the poor we shall always have with us.”

As with the other stories I’ve posted, I’m not satisfied with N&ATH;, and welcome criticism so I can make the next draft much better. I know this one suffers, specifically, from the fact that the pivotal character in the third section doesn’t show up in the first two, and the pivotal character in the first section doesn’t show up in the third. I’m going to fix that for sure. It is a bit of a triptych, but right now it’s a very clumsy one. I’m going to fix it so it’s much more tightly structured.

Anyway, other criticism is very very welcome.