BLOG/RELIEF: ALMOST ALL WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL. ALMOST ALL MEN ARE AVERAGE. And five more things I know but cannot prove, for Yurodivi and wife, who gave to a local food bank.

1. If you wear it long enough, any mask will sink into the skin.

2. Despair is pride: Look at me! I’m so extra-special, my situation is so sparklingly unique, that nothing can save me! …No, probably not. You are unlikely to be unprecedented.

3. When you don’t know what else to do, throw a party.

4. (this will get me flamed) Hour of the Wolf should have been a werewolf movie. Yeah, yeah, I know: It’s got brilliant, swoopy, intense camerawork; a phenomenal female lead (wasn’t so much sold on the male lead); and a powerful evocation of a troubled conscience. (There’s one speech in particular, about a child’s conscience, that really moved me.) But I can’t help thinking it would’ve been a much better movie if it had had brilliant, swoopy, intense camerawork; a phenomenal female lead; a powerful evocation of a troubled conscience; and werewolves. C’mon–the whole werewolf myth is about how much guilt can be assigned to one’s most passionate and destructive actions, and what (if anything) separates humans from beasts. Less brooding! More fangs!

5. Everything tastes better with cheese.