Satan, Exorcisms and Halloween

Happy Halloween, even though some consider its celebration another sneaky, nefarious way Satan attacks jam, Jesus, and Jerusalem.

In 2013, exorcisms, the ritual to remove demons possessing the bodies of the living, are still done.

The International Association of Catholic Exorcists (IACE) “is an association for the credentialing of Catholic, Anglican, and Orthodox clergy and lay people as Exorcist, Religious Demonologist, and Paranormal Research Teams.”  Its mission is “to serve the communities of the world, by being a vital resource in battling evil.”  Evil does not include bankers, cigarette makers, polluters of the environment, or unscrupulous insurance companies that will cash in on ObamaCare.

Father Gabriele Amorth, IACE founder, intended to ask Pope Francis to permit more priests to perform exorcists.   According to Fr. Amorth, “Practicing yoga brings evil as does reading Harry Potter.  They may both seem innocuous but they both deal with magic and that leads to evil.”

Not surprisingly, Halloween, even if little Bobbie or baby Linda dress like a super hero and lady bug, is also a Satanic conspiracy.

According to Fr. Amorth, Satan doesn’t like to hear Latin spoken, especially during an exorcist.  Hebrew and Aramaic, the languages used during the days of Jesus, doesn’t give demons heartburn, but Latin does, the language used by Caligula, the demented Roman leader.  Go figure.  Fr. Amorth claims he’s chased away 160,000 demons in his career as an exorcist.

Rome has its own, officially designated exorcist.  Perhaps Washington and Wall Street each need one as well.

There’s also the American Association of Exorcists, “a Bible-based Christian organization.”  It offers courses on “U.F.O’s: The Occult Connection/U.F.O. Cults”, “The Ouija Board”, “Astrology and Divination”, and “Witchcraft/Wicca”.

Purportedly, Satan hates women most of all since there are a higher number of females possessed than men.  Lucifer especially dislikes the Virgin Mary who many believe gave birth to the Son of God through an immaculate conception.  I wonder what Freud or Jung would say about Lucifer’s phobia toward women.

Assuming Satan actually exists and reigns from a throne of fire, I always wondered why no one prays for Lucifer’s forgiveness and redemption.  He is, after all, a creation of God.  Hence, all things reflect God.  If those battling him insist Lucifer would never seek forgiveness then perhaps they don’t believe in miracles or the power of prayer.

Why not start a special order of priests dedicated to praying for Lucifer so he gives up evil ways and comes back to goodness?  I suspect he’d find prayers on his behalf more offensive than hearing Latin.

The religious hierarchy, pick your flavor, has long used Satan to maintain power.  The spiritually hungry challenging or questioning religious rulers is likely to get the person ostracized or told they’re being a partner in Lucifer’s diabolical plan to bring about the End of Times.

Why does Satan choose to have his minions possess the bodies of individuals who have no political or social power?  Wouldn’t it be more logical to have politicians possessed?  Or maybe Washington is a den of demon possessed officials and bureaucrats.  If Satan has the power to send forth his spawn to possess bodies, why not reanimate the dead?  I’d be far more worried about hungry zombies outside my door than a supernatural being that dislikes Latin.

If there are demons, not mental illnesses identified by science and medicine, possessing people, it may explain the greed of bankers and the incivility and incompetence in Washington.  Or is it another excuse not to take responsibility preferring instead to project personal foibles onto demons of our own making?

What if Satan were removed from popular culture often used to demonize and disempower those that seem different to the majority?  Wouldn’t that bring a level of logic and common sense to personal faith and spirituality, thus nurturing both?

Someone once said “Faith without science is superstition.  Science without faith is hubris.”  This is an age of declining church attendance.  An increasing number of people affiliate with no denomination and in some cases faith, while still identifying as spiritual, yet struggle to find the right balance between faith and science as technology controls our lives.

Religion and religious leaders need to empower, not nurture superstition.

Paul Jesep is a policy analyst and corporate chaplain.  His latest book, “The Vampire Benning Wentworth and the End of Times,” is set in nineteenth century New England.  Its main character is a banker, vampire, and son of Lucifer, who allies himself with a candidate for Congress and becomes an unintended foil for corporate religion and modern Pharisees.