When Blogging Isn’t Fun Anymore

When Blogging Isn’t Fun Anymore January 14, 2015

I started this blog back in 2008, a few months before Atticus and I were married. I just “celebrated” six years of writing here in November. Appropriately enough, I celebrated by staying quiet. Quiet has been my default for quite some time. Some of you may have even noticed this, though I don’t flatter myself interesting enough to suspect you’ve been waiting with baited breath for my next post.

There are a few reasons for why it’s been quiet over here:

1. For the last year I’ve had three kids under age 4. Finally, We have a four year old and the twins made it to their first birthday. It was December 2nd and I didn’t even manage to post a measley picture. The writing life has its ebb and flow. I’ve been writing, online and off, since I was a kid. Sometimes every day for a long stretch, sometimes months without a word. It’s been an ebb sort of year. Every extra moment, those precious moments when no one needs me, I can: exercise, take a shower, read a book for fun, pray, or write a blog post. Usually, blogging comes in last, or nearly last.

2. It takes a really long time. For me to write a post, take, edit, and upload all the pictures I need to have in order to publish a post, takes me around an hour. A whole hour. And that’s if it’s not a content heavy post. Sometimes it takes longer. Do you know what an hour is worth around here? When I have an idea I’m excited about, or something I think you all will like, I’m happy to spend an hour on it. Then I push “publish” and 50 people look at it. Maybe I’ve been doing this too long, but at this point, 50 views doesn’t always seem worth the time spent away from my family and vocation, on a hobby which generates not one dime for my family.

3. I make no money. And I am just fine with that. I have no interest or plans to monetize my blog. Of course if I like a product and am asked to review it, I will. But I’m not seeking that out, and anything that I share that I love or we use, I am sharing for just those reasons. However, since I make no money doing this, it hardly seems fair to my family to spend more than a couple of hours a week working on it. Not to mention keeping up with all the social media I’m supposed to have (Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Facebook), and reading other people’s blogs (My feedly and blog lovin’ are out of control). I’d like to occasionally have a coffee with a local friend, or some alone time with my husband.

4. The community feels disjointed. This is a big one. When I started Fumbling Toward Grace, I “met” a wonderful community of other women who were blogging too. There were 10-15 or so of us, and we always read each others pages, commented on them, and just generally connected. It felt personal. Not because of some marketing ploy to make it feel personal, but because it was personal. We didn’t worry about our “brand”. We didn’t worry about having “x” number of photos on each post, or maximizing our SEO (If you don’t know what that means, good for you!), etc. I’m not an SEO girl. I’m not a brand girl. I have tried a few times, making a detailed blogging schedule, and a plan for expanding my readership by doing x,y,z. It’s just not for me. It felt forced because it was forced. I don’t want to treat this page like a tool I’m using to get myself out there. Sure, there’s a part of me that would love to be “out there”, but more and more I realize, perhaps not on this platform.

5. I am not really a blogger. In a certain sense, I am. I own and run a blog. That makes me a blogger. But what I mean is, being the kind of blogger who people have heard of, who is “out there” requires a certain skill set that I don’t really have. Which is fine. I’m not a web designer. I’m not a photographer. I’m not a code writer. I don’t have the time, money, or inclination right now to change that. I’m just a plain old regular writer. I want to write my thoughts and share with them with you all, without worrying about if I have a “pinnable” image. To be honest, I’m not even sure I know what a pinnable image is. I have thoughts, stories, and ideas to share, and I know that at least a few of them are worth sharing. I am working on a book. A book I was basically told no one would want to publish because I have “low readership”. Oh well. Excuse me, but eff that shit. I’m writing a book, and even if I have to churn it out myself Guttenburg style, someday you’ll see it published. I do NOT need to be a blogger with “high readership” to write a book. I’m writer. This website, this is where I share my writing.

There’s nothing wrong with taking amazing photos and having most of your blog be pictures. Or making a pinnable image for each post. Or creating a “brand” and making your blog into a business. These are all worthy and good things for people to do. If and when they want to. Some people get the same kind of thrill out of that stuff that I get out of drinking a whiskey sour with my husband after all the kids are in bed. And I’m at a place in my life where right now, I don’t get both. I have to choose the husband. I want to choose the husband, the kids, the getting a whole house packed up to move across town. Because lots of other, more talented, more interesting bloggers are blogging all over this world 24 hours a day. But nobody else can be what I am within these four walls.

Fear not, dear reader and friend. I’m not closing up shop. I will still be around, and post when time and inspiration permits me. This page has become a part of me, and while for now my mind and heart is mostly focused on other things, she’s always there, in the background. I’ll be reading something and think of how I’d like to share it with you all. Or cooking dinner and think of sharing the recipe. And you see, I would share the recipe. But I know I don’t have 2 hours to take a picture of each step, edit it, and write it all down. Maybe someday, but not this day. Instead, I’ll just sit and enjoy it with my kids. I know the internet will always be here, but my babies won’t always be babies, won’t always want me most of all, and when that bittersweet day comes, I’ll have plenty of time for blogging.

Love and Grace,

Sarah

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Eff that sh*t is right because I can’t wait read your book. I am grateful to have met you through the blog world and glad to be here to read your thoughts, Pinterest or not haha. Xxoo

  • Lots of love Sarah! I’ve always appreciated your writing and I completely understand the time thing…because…babies! I’ll miss you!

  • Lucky as Sunshine

    Enjoy the kiddos !!

  • Cara

    Sarah, I stumbled onto your blog about 2 years ago when My priest at the time has shared one of your posts about secondary infertility issues. I felt an immediate connection with you, as I had just gone through a second miscarriage, and at the time had 2 healthy children but so desperately wanted to know why God had put us through this again when we wanted it so badly. We conceived around the same time you did with the twins and Veronica was born on 12/11/13. Our lives are very different, but the feelings of having to choose wisely how you will spend every spare moment with your precious babies are the same. Thank you for the time you have dedicated to this blog. You helped me through some tough times. I look forward to your future posts when time allows.

  • Bravo to writing books no one will publish because of “low readership” on a blog! I’m looking forward to reading your future book!

  • bonnieeng

    One of the things about your writing is that often it leaves me thinking and not wanting to comment. I’m glad you’re taking your time and living your life and NOT closing up shop. I like your little corner of the internet. 🙂

  • Sarah, I came across your blog after Edel. There are a number of posts I’ve emailed to some of my close girlfriends here in Dallas that I know touched them so very much. Especially the ones about mothering while you have lost your mother. I can’t tell you how much those posts meant to me and there are still some I’d like to go through and share with a good friend of mine who lost her mother at a young age (when we met in elementary is when her mother passed away and have been best friends since). I am sorry for your loss but am thankful for how you have had such grace to share about it. I’ll keep coming back (Up until Edel I was never much of a commenter.) so thank you for not closing shop, but I appreciate everything you’ve said! And, yay for your book!!!! And you’re amazing because, 3, 4 and under! I have two and I wonder how I make it to the end of the day sometimes! Hugs and prayers!

  • I totally feel you on this (minus the having three kids under 4). When I get into periods when my life feels busy or other things are taking up my time, my blog writing will lax too. But I agree that something about the writing keeps pulling me back. A great thing about blogging is that you can make all your own rules and make it your own – whatever that looks like. Looking forward to seeing that book of yours 🙂

  • I enjoy reading your blog whenever you post, however frequent or infrequent that may be. 🙂 I’ve been reading your blog for several (3?) years now. I rarely comment, but enjoy reading it.

    And, you write your book! That is ridiculous criteria that you have to be ” high readership” blog to publish. Bologna! A writer is a writer – you gotta write!

  • All the best to you. I’m glad you are stepping away to be with your babies because it all goes by too fast. I look forward to reading your future book. 🙂

  • Hi Sarah–I’ve only recently found your blog and have really enjoyed it. I appreciate your post today because you so eloquently put into words some of the bewildering feelings I have had about the blogging world. I’ve been praying for more Catholic women friends, and have ‘met’ some people through the blog world. This has been both incredibly inspiring–to come to know so many wonderful Catholic women–and frustrating because in many ways I don’t really ‘know’ them. Some of the blogs that have ‘pinnable’ images don’t feel real to me–sometimes I feel like I am reading a magazine rather than connecting with a person. I feel like starting a blog myself is the only way to enter this world of Catholic women I have so longed to connect with–but, like you, I have a husband and young children and a full time job and other priorities for my time. Thank you for keeping your blog personal. It reminds me of what I like about reading blogs. And I look forward to reading your book!

  • eysaint

    Well said! 🙂

  • leilaatlittlecatholicbubble

    Oh, man, I totally understand this! And I don’t know what SEO is, so I am happy about that, ha ha!

  • Sometime last year I realized that the fact that I was sitting around, reading these blogs that were other people’s “projects” and dreams. And by doing so I was literally putting my own skills and projects on hold to do what now? Read something I would forget about 10 seconds later? The blogging world is so different, I agree. It’s so polished, and monetizing…yikes. I loathe it. So I don’t read. And i do what I feel God is calling me to do in other parts of my life. So, rock on. Write that book. Find your way.

  • Pat

    I have truly missed your writings.. It was delightful when I went to your site today and found something new to read. You will get a book published. Probably when you and Atticus are empty nesters.