The New iPhone! (That Time of Year Again)

In the spring of 2012, my wife Tara and I were in Baltimore for my cousin’s wedding. The day before the big event, all family members were charged with running various last minute errands all over the city. As my massive family stood crammed together in one room to receive instructions on where to go and what to pick up, I noticed everyone typing addresses and notes into their smartphones. The room soon emptied of bodies like secret agents on highly-classified missions, leaving my wife and I alone with my cousin and her fiancé.

“Um,” I began. “Do you think you could write down directions for us?” I reached into my pocket and pulled out my little LG flip phone, a relic I’d used since 2008 (it’s this whole other decade).

Tara and I stood there sheepishly as my cousin took the time to write down step-by-step directions to each location we were to visit and what we were to pick up or drop off. I quickly realized that in our current era, a fifteen minute delay could pretty much bring about the apocalypse. As Tara and I scurried off to our car, papers of directions shuffling in tow, we knew one thing was clear: it was time to get iPhones.

A few weeks later, we were each the proud new owners of an iPhone4S. We relished in the fact that we always had a camera with us (something we routinely forgot). We posted social media updates and sent emails everywhere we went. We asked Siri all sorts of (mostly pointless) questions. And, of course, we always had our GPS at the ready. In short order we (okay, I) became smartphone snobs.

Six months later, the iPhone 5 dropped on us like Zoolander’s Magnum. A lighter, sleeker, slightly longer model that offered a whole extra row of apps (I mean, who wants to scroll to the next page over?). With the new phone came the release of iOS 6, which, unfortunately, did not include the default Google Maps and YouTube apps included on previous operating systems (which have since been redone as brand new and improved apps, whew!). While I ended up downloading iOS 6 onto my phone, I opted against getting the iPhone 5 since I’d just dropped a few hundred bucks on the 4S and quite frankly, the upgrades on the 5 didn’t seem worth the trouble.

Not the case this year, however.

According to a recent report, the new iPhone (tentatively called the iPhone5S) will be unveiled on September 10th. It’s worth noting, according to a friend of mine who works in the industry, that if Apple history is any precedent, the new phone probably won’t ship for a few weeks after its unveiling. But what’s exciting is that this time around, for the first time in iPhone history, the new release may also include a new lower-cost iPhone option as well.

In addition to camera upgrades and all around basic enhancements, the iPhone5S will be running on iOS 7, which has been in testing since this past June and is supposed to include a complete redesign of the iPhone’s menu and icons. As we’ve learned from the launch of iOS 6, not all change is good, but here’s hoping!

Oh, and if anyone from Apple is listening, if the new operating system could also include a feature that repels the the stickiness of two-year-old hands, that would be much appreciated.

Alan Atchison is a Contributing Writer to The Rogue. He is a Senior Publications Editor at the Center for the Advanced Study of India (University of Pennsylvania), where he also earned a Masters of Liberal Arts in Creative Writing. He lives in Philadelphia, PA with his wife and two daughters. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram.