Refresh Your Brain to Clear a Path to Your Highest Potential

Have you ever thought about how important emotions are for creating your quality of life? They are so important that they are your quality of life. Emotions make the difference between what we call a “good day” and what we call a “bad day.” Good days are full of smiles and laughter, while bad days are made of anxiety and annoyance. But how do we make sure that we have more good days? Happy days are just a matter of luck, right?

Personally, I believe happiness is not just luck; it’s something we can choose—by choosing positive emotions. People speak of emotions as though they are an automatic result of the situations we experience, simple reflexes that we cannot control. We blame them on things outside of ourselves, saying, “She made me mad” or “That makes me happy.” However, emotions come from inside of you, and you have the power to choose the emotions you have. Exercising this power is essential for growing past your limitations and for manifesting your full potential.

There are three critical skills you must master, however, if want to become the master of your emotions. These skills are the essence of the third step of my Brain Education method, Brain Refreshing, which I have explained here:

Skill 1: Know Your Emotions and Moods
The first step toward emotional mastery is the ability to see yourself clearly. That sounds simple, but few people even try to do this. To do so, you must be 100 percent honest about your own mind and emotions, especially about negative thoughts and emotions. Most of us like to see ourselves in a positive light, as well we should, but sometimes this egocentrism can lead us to deny emotions we hide inside.

For example, it can be hard to admit that we hold damaging jealousy or resentment toward others, if it doesn’t fit our self-image or if we would rather focus on defending our justifications for these emotions. So, first, be honest about what you are really feeling and remember that there is no reason to feel any shame about them since they are a normal part of human experience. Once you recognize that they are there, you are ready to begin changing them if you wish.

Skill 2: Clear Negative Emotions
Next, once you realize what emotions you are dealing with, you can choose to let them go if you wish. Sometimes that can be as easy as saying to yourself, “I really don’t need to be angry about that anymore” or “Why am I afraid about something that hasn’t even happened?” But it can be much more difficult to drop negative emotions if you are attached to the ideas and beliefs that created them.

All the negative emotions that we cling to are based on preconceptions that we hold about how the world should be. For example, if you have a preconception that others should address you in a certain way, you will have a negative emotional reaction if they don’t, even if they did not intend to hurt you in any way. Or, if you think that you should have achieved a certain amount of wealth by your current age, you will feel anxiety about that if you haven’t. A person who doesn’t have that same belief will be much more happy-go-lucky about the progress of their life. Recognizing these preconceptions and dropping the ones that harm or upset us—and realizing that they are just beliefs, not reality—can allow peace-of-mind to replace anger, frustration, and fear.

Skill 3: Develop Positive Emotional Habits
The next skill is a matter of developing a new and better habit—one based in love, gratitude, and joy instead of anxiety, frustration, and fear. Our brain can become addicted to the negative emotions we feel, and negative emotions can in turn undermine our lives, dampening our determination to grow and move ahead in life. Emotional habits are like any other habit—they can be changed if we apply our determination and discipline. To create better emotional habits, one must continuously choose the more beneficial perspective and more positive emotions until the positive pattern replaces the negative. In my next blog, I will share some exercises that can be used to help retrain your brain in this way.

The Open Road Ahead
Learning to clear your unwanted and unhealthy negative emotions makes the path of your life like an open freeway, instead of like a traffic jam. If you are bogged down by doubt and resentment, of course you will find it hard to move ahead. Author Mavis Mahura, who teaches emotional intelligence, put it this way: “Emotions can get in the way or get you on the way.” A joyful mind and a positive outlook are required for maintaining motivation on the road to becoming the best possible versions of ourselves; they are like the fuel that keeps you going toward your dreams. Since it is within your power to clear the roadblocks away and to start moving forward, why not start doing that today?