Sure, I could be coy. But why be a garishly colored goldfish with a glandular disorder? Fie on that. Like the detergent, I, too, shall be bold. (Wait. Do they still make Bold detergent? I feel like I don’t see that in the stores anymore. If Bold detergent has, in fact, gone the way of … well, let’s see … Vanilla Coke, Fizzies, and Pineapple Fanta [um … this might explain my teeth; and now I’m stuck thinking of Fanta as Santa’s tubby brother: so today’s ruined], it’s for sure because of Bold’s TV commercials, such as the 80’s one below.
Yikes. While, like most people, I enjoy seeing the elderly being sensually stimulated by their sweaters, in this particular case I found it disturbing, because of how much this woman looks like June Cleaver. I don’t want to have to think of June Cleaver … you know … deciding she really enjoys static cling. Because then I have to think of her husband Ward responding to that. And then I have to think of the two of them lying in bed afterward, conjuring up horrendous nicknames for their boys. So I’d rather just not go there at all. (Sad note: last month Barbara Billingsley died. She was ninety-four. Which would make The Beav around seventy. Which would make me wonder what the #$@%!! happened to my life. But whatever.)
Today is the day before Thanksgiving. That (duh) puts me in mind of those things for which I’m genuinely thankful. And foremost amongst those things (directly after my wife, actually) is (and I’m not sure how to say this without it sounding pretentious) my readers.
Is my readers? That doesn’t look right.
Are my readers? That seems right—but looks wrong.
Much like our Bold commercial.
Anyway, I would absolutely be lost without my readers. You guys leave the great comments; you send me the great emails; you join my Facebook page so that publishers and their ilk are basically forced to take me seriously; you share my posts and blog with others; you link to me from your blogs and websites; you Photoshop pictures of me; you make bumper stickers and drawings about me and my work; you encourage me to make johnshore.com tee-shirts; you buy my books. In every possible way, you let me know that you’re out there, listening, thinking, and caring.
It really is something for which I am sincerely and every day thankful. As I say, I simply don’t know where I’d be without you guys.
Well, actually, I do. And (trust me) it wouldn’t be pretty.
Thank you. A blessed, wonderful Thanksgiving to each and every one of you.