I’ve been grumpy this week.

Typically, I’m a very joyful person and quickly hand over my difficult circumstances, troubles and cares to my Father, and allow Him to infuse my soul with His joy. This week was different; I decided to grumble instead.

– I was supposed to go on an international trip to one of my favorite countries in less than two weeks; I found out that I can’t go due to work.

– Work has been challenging recently, and I’ve been struggling.

– This time of year is always difficult for me, because I’m reminded of some intense suffering I went through a couple of years ago, and the death of a dream.

– To top it all off….it’s been pouring raining all week.

I felt like the wind has been knocked out of me, and bitter disappointment set in.

I have a confession.

My first reaction was to cry all week. I’m not proud of it, but it’s real life. All week, I’ve been “off”, and I’ve complained to anyone that would indulge me, and my words were tainted with murmuring. Frankly I miserable most of the week, because I had chosen to whine about my circumstances.

Someone had the boldness to speak the above truth into my life this week. Whether I like it or not, my words reveal what’s in my heart. I’d chosen to remain in my misery, and even wrote a little “how to” list.

How do you make yourself miserable?

– Focus on the problem

– Focus on the disappointment

– Focus on what you think you deserve

– Focus on yourself

I was being disobedient, and completely disobeying the command in Philippians 2:14,

“Do all things without grumbling or disputing.”

After deciding that enough was enough, I slipped away to be alone with my Father. Repenting for my disobedience and my discontentment, I confessed that I had allowed my eyes to focus on the disappointment, instead of the One who holds the whole world in His hands. My King woo’s me to Himself. I don’t deserve it, but He will always love me. Not because I’m lovely or worthy of that love, but because He’s chosen me, saved me, and calls me His own.

Oh beloved, in the daily grind of life, we are faced with a choice. How will we respond?