Response to “Opinion for My husband is homosexual.”

I appreciate the honesty and opinions. The shutting out occurred primarily as a result of years of both denial (denial that I had any right to want happiness) and sadness (sadness with the reality I am now facing). He has hidden his struggle all his life… of course he did…. but consequently lied and lied again and again to cover up more lies. I understand the struggle, I have researched, I have sought understanding. I do not “blame” him. I do however, NOT approve of his choices. I do not approve of his choosing his addiction over me or our family. And thus, I shut him out. Wrong as it is. I have shut him out to try and protect myself, when all I have been doing is letting Satan in. Therefore, you are right to counsel coming unto Christ… and that is my goal. Of course my emotions play into this, I have a large bias…. I panic and I stress because the man that told me he loves me LIED! His struggle is far from trivial, and my wanting to be loved both spiritually AND physically is not trivial in comparison. I have large issues to work out… thank you for helping me see that. One of the largest issues is developing an understanding that “I am a Child of God” and it is time for me to take “action” towards a better future. Thank you for your concern and advice!

I can already see a shift in your language. Instead of presenting yourself as only a victim, in this paragraph you are already taking a more active stance. You are willing to recognize where your husband is coming from and yet still hold him accountable for his actions. You are willing to recognize where you are coming from and yet hold yourself accountable for your actions. And I can see you moving towards the possibility of change and acting in the behalf of yourself, your needs, your relationship and your family. Keep the inertia going! Good for you.