14 Ways to Help Your Child with Special Needs Succeed in a Religious School

4. Request a meeting with your child’s teacher and team. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that just because it is a religious school that you can skip this process. Yes, you and they are busy. However, if you miss out on doing a real substantive conversation, you may create a situation that will turn your child off to religion.

Additionally, it is not enough to meet with the principal of the school or the clergy. You need to sit face-to-face with the actual person who will be in the classroom with your child, as well as the school leaders who support that teacher. Invite the clergy to the meeting as well. If needed, bring your child’s therapists. Depending on the age of your child, you may want to bring them to this meeting. Part of this meeting should also be about why being able to come as a family to your congregation is important to all of you.

In advance of the meeting, you should send your letter about your child to all the meeting participants. Bring copies of it to the meeting as well, and have your “elevator pitch” about your child ready to go. You may want to practice it in front of someone in advance. It is important to get your points across quickly so they can ask questions. Teachers will really appreciate your efforts, resources and transparency.

Once the teachers learn about your child, the school may want to put an extra aid in the classroom to support your child’s needs. Alternatively, they may want to match your child with a different teacher who is more experienced. If so, do your “elevator pitch” and Q&A with that teacher as well. The congregational school may benefit from having your child’s occupational or physical therapist meet with them, or join the class for a day, to give the teacher some tips.

Still, painful though it may be, you need to leave room for them to say that they cannot meet your child’s needs and you need to look elsewhere. It is much better to switch congregations or religious schools, or move to a different sort of engagement, than to put your child in a place that isn’t safe and supportive.

In advance, consider what suggestions you may want to give when and if they bring up things like they don’t know enough, or they cannot accommodate all of your child’s needs or they don’t have the resources to provide extra support. Figure out ahead of time what are your non-negotiables, and what you can work with them on.

Next: How does your child’s teacher communicate?