You Ever Have One of These Phone Calls?

Probably not. Sometimes pastors get weird phone calls. Like, really weird. Here’s literally a phone call that I got when I walked into my office yesterday morning:

Sharon* wanted to know a pastor’s opinion on what she should do. She’s never been to Mt Vernon, nor does she attend church regularly. Her other pastor wasn’t in, so she found us in the phone book. She originally met her boyfriend Tommy* when she was 31 and he was 19. They tried to make the relationship work, but for reasons she can’t understand, his parents didn’t approve and they had to break up.

Seven years go by. Last year she finally “got that internet” (her exact words). Lo and behold, Tommy had a Facebook account. Sharon found out Tommy was now married. Sharon asked her aunt (come to found out that she’s not the best fount of knowledge) what she should do. Aunt tells her, “Message him, what could it hurt?” So, Sharon starts messaging her married ex-boyfriend. New Year’s comes around, and Tommy posts on Facebook, “Starting the New Year off right, finally got divorced and looking for a relationship. Hit me up if you’re interested.” Sharon is ecstatic.

Tommy and Sharon start a whirlwind relationship of (now going on) three weeks. She’s spent a few weekends at his place (she doesn’t have a car of her own yet at 38 years old). In the midst of all these red flags, here’s her dilemma: Tommy is pushing to get remarried, fast. He told Sharon that this weekend he’s fixing to propose to her so that she could be his “wifey” (his exact words). She feels that it’s a bit to soon. He wants to get married in August, she wants to wait a few years. She’s got a sneaking suspicion that his recent divorce might be a red flag. So, she called me as a random stranger and asked my opinion.

Honest to goodness this was the story I heard. It was part comical, part tragic. Sharon didn’t sound like the most educated person in the world, and her decision making skills (thanks to her aunt) aren’t the best. My first thought when listening to her was, “Is this for real?” My second thought was heartbreak. She’s a daughter of God, and I got the picture that she hasn’t had much of a chance at life. That’s why she’s grasping at the overtures of a three-week boyfriend with the ink still drying on his divorce papers.

Obviously, I told her she should not get engaged to Tommy. She deserves better. As I hung up, I was reminded again of the terrible effects of sin in the world, and the ignorance that many people still live in. Sharon is why I can’t give up as a minister. If I’m the only source of wisdom in her life, and if God directs her in my path, I need to be there for her.

QUESTION: Is there a Sharon in your life?

*not real name