Choosing kindness when your heart hurts

Choosing kindness when your heart hurts January 25, 2017

30 day kindness challenge: How I'm becoming a better mom in 30 days and how to choose to be kind when you are sad.


Cue my inner Garfield the cat, because this Monday was the Monday-est of all Mondays.

I woke up burdened.

I wasn’t my typical cheery self, sprinkling sunshine on our breakfast while singing songs over my cup of coffee while completely ignoring the eye rolls from the teenager.

Not this Monday.

I physically felt the heaviness on my shoulders and the ache in my heart.

No matter how I tried to shake this feeling, it didn’t escape me.

My husband attempted with all his humorous might to elicit a smile, with no success.

My boys tried giving me extra hugs and asked what was wrong and I honestly couldn’t give them an answer.

I didn’t know the cause of my heartache, so I had no way of knowing the remedy.

30 day kindness challenge: How I'm becoming a better mom in 30 days and how to choose to be kind when you are sad.

Frustrated and confused, our house was turned upside down. Everything in me was begging to crawl back into bed. I did my best to keep my hands busy throughout the day in order to keep the darkness at bay, but by seven o’clock, the burden won and I escaped into my room.

But despite this unusual sadness, I still tried to stay true to this 30 Day Kindness challenge and it was difficult, but it wasn’t as challenging as I thought. As I lie there in my cocoon, I couldn’t help but notice a change in my heart.

If you read my previous post, I am focusing becoming a better Mom to my boys during this Kindness Challenge. Can the simple act of being kind and spreading joy really radically change your heart?

Oh, dear friends, yes!

It’s only 10 days into the challenge and I have to admit that I’m seeing marked changes after the first few days. I started noticing that the behaviors that normally drove me to pull my hair out weren’t as annoying as they once were.

The simple shift in focus, the looking for the good things instead of spotlighting the bad, has begun to change not just me, but our entire family dynamic.  We are communicating better. We’re offering encouraging words instead of hurtful criticism. Even the boys are handling their disagreements with each other better.

30 day kindness challenge: How I'm becoming a better mom in 30 days and how to choose to be kind when you are sad.

While it’s not a perfect process every day, it’s hard not to recognize that each day is getting better. And especially on that bluest of blue funk days, even then this Kindness could be seen.  The boys were sweet to me, because I had been sweet to them.  My husband loving offered me dinner in bed because he saw I needed my space.

It’s respect.

It’s love.

It’s kindness.

Have you joined the challenge yet? Do you have a relationship that you long to radically change? I encourage to you take the first step and join the challenge.  Hopefully you will be as pleasantly surprised as I am!

This program is based on the book The Kindness Challenge: Thirty Days to Improve Any Relationship.  If you would like your own copy, click here:

Do you long to have a better relationship with your kids? I have transformed how I'm parenting by taking the 30 day Kindness Challenge!

I love to hear from y’all and your comments make my day! To leave me a note, scroll to the bottom of this post.

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