Solstice Reflections

Solstice Reflections December 23, 2014

This is a part of a series by Staff of Asclepius contributors. I think it is important to take stock of the year. For me the old Pagan year ended on the last harvest, or Samhain. Yule marks the beginning of the new. In between is a time to rest, and evaluate where we stand. What have I gained, what I have lost, what I need to change, what I wish to keep.

I gained:
–The first place I truly felt at home
–a renewed knowledge of my own abilities as a psychic vampire
–the recognition of my sexual preference for women
–My lovely familiar, Lucia
–a spiritual family I can actually call mine
–A broadened interest in various genres of music and types of food
–Enough confidence to fight back against people who have caused me harm

I have lost:
–about 25 pounds
–my favorite black skirt
–my need for an organized religion to follow
–a lot of people who pretended to be my friends
–Most of my DVD collection
–any interest in men whatsoever as partners
–My favorite lounge pants

What I want to be different:
–My inability to tolerate stupid people
–my inability to let go of, rather than bury, painful/angry memories
–a lot of stuff I don’t need
–My lack of a steady girlfriend
–Want to rebuild muscle strength and endurance
–want to take more trips and experience more
–I want to start on the tattoos I’ve wanted for years

I wish to keep same:
–My faith in the Goddess
–my steadily-growing knowledge of magic
–my love of rock/metal/Gothic music
–my close group of friends
–My improving healthcare situation
–My love of writing and crafts
–my hope for a time when I no longer have to fight off the evils of my past, both literal and less so

So that sums up 2014. It was like climbing a sheer cliff-face, with all the struggles that would involve. Sometimes I feel so tired of fighting. But then I just remember that usually, served up alongside the battles of life is a variety of opportunities for joy, excitement, and the finding of new treasures.

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