13 Aspects of the Ouch Life

13 Aspects of the Ouch Life January 20, 2015

I live with chronic pain. I have undiagnosed muscular pain in both hands, from years of typing, crafting, and other activities. I’ve got tendon damage in my left heel, and arthritis in both knees, stemming from a bad fall I took a couple years ago, off a curb and onto ice. I’m also prone to migraines and stress headaches.

Thirteen Aspects of the Ouch Life

1. “Dude, just get over it.”

2. I can’t find my Allieve and I have a migraine. *curls up in ball*

3. Stairs? No problem. (Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! This really sucks.)

4. Good days call for low heels. Bad days call for something cushioned. And no days call for toe-smashing flats.

5. I hate the ceiling light in the kitchen. And the bathroom. And in the sky sometimes.

6. Where is my Advil hiding?

7. My knees forecast the weather. Don’t know exactly what is coming, but it is either going to be cold or wet.

8. Florescent light bulbs are the root of all evil.

9. Where is the volume control on your screaming child? I think my head might burst.

10. How am I supposed to use the crimping pliers, let alone use a light switch? And forget tying shoe laces.

11. My shoes are under the hall table. That means kneeling. *grimace*

12. Oh, we’re walking several blocks? Pain relief oil, check. Poker face, check. Self-driving moped so I don’t have to? …Can’t find that right now.

13. Give me an S! S! Give me a t! T! Give me an I! I! Give me an f-f-f-fudge! To Hades with cheering myself on! I’m going back to bed. Go Team Knees! *flops down on bed*

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