Raised In A Christian Cult

Last updated on: March 11, 2014 at 2:29 pm By Michelle Van Loon

If you’ve ever been stuck in traffic caused by drivers slowing down to get a glimpse of the accident scene, you know we humans are a nosy bunch. So it’s no surprise that readers have devoured a steady stream of recent memoirs penned by people who grew up in abusive, controlling fundamentalist sects. We curiously peek into the barbed-wire edges of different faith traditions—Jewish,Mormon, and Christian—from the perspectives of their former members. While the theology may differ, the plotlines in this... Read more

Review: Jesus Feminist

Last updated on: March 8, 2014 at 1:25 pm By Michelle Van Loon

One of the benefits of being a Patheos blogger is the opportunity to participate in a book club-themed conversation about a particular book during a certain two-week or so time period. It’s interesting to get a lot of different perspectives from a variety of good thinkers on an author’s work. If you decide to purchase the book in question for yourself, you’ll bring all the questions and insights from book club bloggers into the pages as you read it. If... Read more

40+ And The Church/Pastoring Those In Second Adulthood

Last updated on: December 27, 2014 at 7:57 pm By Michelle Van Loon

Last May, after hearing from more than 400 people over the age of 40 about the nature of their relationship with a local church, I made these observations: Church leaders must do some serious thinking about their models for spiritual health, growth and church “success”. Yes, I know there are hundreds of people speaking and writing about how and why to do this, all promoting their specific fix for the problems of our churches (Be missional! Be multi-site! Formal liturgy/modern worship/yada... Read more

The Unfortunate Art of Female Self-Sabotage

Last updated on: March 3, 2014 at 9:04 pm By Michelle Van Loon

Iwas surprised when my friend was terminated from an organization where we both worked for several years. She was a hard worker—always first to volunteer to do thankless tasks and the last to leave the office each day. “That’s what cost me my job,” she said. “I thought I was being a good witness for Christ by serving as the office doormat. People wipe their feet on doormats.” She had raised her two children as a single mother, earned her... Read more

40+ And The Church/What Pastors & Leaders Have To Say (Part 4)

Last updated on: December 27, 2014 at 7:58 pm By Michelle Van Loon

Though Barna’s 2011 survey and my own less-scientific one last spring showed that those over 40 were leaving or greatly decreasing their involvement in their local churches in large numbers, I wondered what pastors of all ages observed about church involvement, attitudes and spiritual needs of the congregants in their second adulthoods, so I asked them. (Click here to see earlier posts about the results of this survey.) Today, I’ll be sharing what some of these pastors had to say... Read more

40+ And The Church: What Pastors & Leaders Have To Say (Part 3)

Last updated on: February 24, 2014 at 10:10 am By Michelle Van Loon

They’re more willing to serve. They’re less willing to serve. The pastors and leaders who responded to my survey querying pastors and leaders about the joys and challenges of ministering to congregants over age 40 reported both as the case in their churches. Those who reported that older members were more willing to serve were talking about this group – the 53% of age 40+ congregants who responded to a survey I did last summer telling me they were more... Read more

40+ And The Church: What Pastors & Leaders Have To Say (Part 2)

Last updated on: February 20, 2014 at 11:17 am By Michelle Van Loon

The first post in this series offers a look at the demographics of those who responded to my survey of pastors and church leaders in search of their insight about how they’re ministering to and with congregants over age 40. (Click here to read it.) I’m sure the call to pass on our faith from one generation to the next predates the Shema (Deuteronomy 6:4-9), but the words given to Israel before they crossed into the promised land after 40... Read more

40+ And The Church: What Pastors & Leaders Have To Say (Part 1)

Last updated on: February 18, 2014 at 7:58 pm By Michelle Van Loon

Two weeks ago, I invited pastors and leaders to weigh in on the topic of older adults in their congregations. (Click here if you’d like to take this brief survey. I’ll be keeping the survey active for at least 2 more weeks.) I’ve heard from nearly 60 leaders to date. While I received a fair amount of feedback from pastors and other congregational leaders in the survey I did last summer querying those over 40 to share about their relationship... Read more

A Women’s Conference For The Mind (And Heart, Soul, and Strength)

Last updated on: February 18, 2014 at 3:47 pm By Michelle Van Loon

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” –Mark 12:30, Deuteronomy 6:5 Most of the churches I’ve attended over the last four decades have put the accent on different parts of this command. Some put the emphasis on strength, service, community action and outreach. Others have put the emphasis on the soul – personal piety for believers and evangelism of not-yet-believers were the primary... Read more

Can Christians “forgive themselves”?

Last updated on: December 27, 2014 at 8:07 pm By Michelle Van Loon

Last fall, just as I was putting my finishing touches on my book about regret, a friend sent me a link to this blog post. The author, Chad Bird, suggests that we are deluding ourselves when we talk about forgiving ourselves: “For a time I believed such advice. No more. I know now that to ‘forgive yourself’ is not only impossible; it is foolish, dangerous, and futile. It is the vain attempt of a soul plagued by guilt to seek... Read more