Let’s Make Eulogies a Thing of the Past

I rewatched the funeral of Queen Elizabeth II the other day. Another thing hit me. There were no eulogies, by the grace of God.

At my funeral, I want someone with good aim sitting in the front pew holding a barrel full of overripe tomatoes. Anyone who dares to say, “We’re here to celebrate his life,” shall be pelted with tomatoes. The same goes for anyone who tries to give a eulogy.

Eulogies are a recent phenomenon, particularly in liturgical churches. The fact that they’ve come to be expected is due to our individualistic and increasingly de-churched, de-Christianized society. When people don’t have hope in Christ, or don’t understand that the funeral is about his victory over death, the occasions often become “celebrations of life.” You can’t have a celebration of life without a eulogy.

Good liturgy which proclaims the gospel is the antidote to the celebration of life. It keeps the main thing from becoming a sideshow to a anthropocentric lovefest.

If you aren’t into liturgy, you should go get some before you die, and take your family with you, so that they see and understand it. There’s nothing worse than having to explain the significance of the funeral liturgy to a grieving family who haven’t the foggiest what worship is about.

I’m not talking about the ad hoc disposable pseudo-liturgies that are en vogue, the kind you can pay a thousand dollars to learn how to write at a “worship” conference.

Go find some historic liturgy like that which is found in the faithful parishes of the Queen’s tradition, among many others. It’s the kind you repeat often so that it sticks with you and forms you. The kind that is bathed in Holy Scripture, which has molded the hearts and minds of Christians for centuries, even longer.

The sort of liturgy also keeps the playing field level. We are all, the late Her Majesty included, sinners in need of God’s grace.

Any decent funeral liturgy is not about a celebration of life. At least, not a celebration of the deceased’s life. The point of the whole thing is to witness to the resurrection of Christ, and the victory that Christ has won for us, and the fact that, for those in Christ, death doesn’t get the final word.

I hope and pray that, for my family and loved ones, the promise of resurrection is the most comforting thing for them to hear. If it isn’t, I still want them to hear it, so that they might believe it for themselves. I want them to hear about Christ’s victory over death, not about how much I loved baseball or told dumb jokes or earned a weird combination of degrees.

If they want to sit around and tell stories and reminisce, so be it, but do it at lunch. Remembering the good times will not defeat death. Only Jesus can do that. His life ended in a death which ended with a resurrection. That is the life worth celebrating. His is the life worth eulogizing.