Confusion

I had my first appointment last week at my midwife’s office. She was wonderful, as usual, but her new nurse…I think I confused her a bit. She asked all the usual questions about my gynecological history but kept calling my miscarriages abortions and then saying “oh yeah” when I corrected her. (In her defense, she is coming from working at a hospital and clinic where such things must be routine.) Then we had this exchange:

her: “How many pregnancies?”

me: “Eight”

her: “And just the two abortions?”

me: “Miscarriages.”

her: “Yeah, losses.”

(pause for writing)

her: “And how many living children?”

me (not really thinking): “Six”

her: “So this will be number seven?”

me: “No. This is number six.”

her: “So five living children.”

me: “No, six including this one.”

her: “Yeah, but five children, two losses and one pregnancy.”

me: “No. Two losses. Six children, one of whom is not born yet.”

her (getting upset with me): But we don’t count that one as alive yet.

me: “Write it down any way you want, but the answer is two losses and six living children. It has a heartbeat, it is alive.”

Exasperated look just short of an eye roll from her. I could tell that if we were anywhere else she would have lost it at this point.

My sweet Computer Guy, to her: “Let it go, you won’t win this one.”

Love him! and praying for her. Hopefully my midwife’s joyful attitude towards babies and life will rub off on her a bit. It was a slip of the tongue originally, but having declared my baby to be alive, I could not back down and relegate our sweet #6 to being classified as something less than alive. Growing, kicking, jumping, full of life with a rapidly beating heart….is it possible to be any more alive than this?