The Fairness Doctrine

Last updated on: May 18, 2019 at 6:55 pm By Sarah Hamaker

“It’s not fair!” is one of the rallying cries of childhood. At any given moment, somewhere in the world, a child is sure he’s not getting a fair shake. Practicing the fairness doctrine doesn’t lead to generosity and gentleness of spirit but to grumbling and hoarding. Among siblings, pursuit of fairness as a parent can create conflict, frustration, and disappointment because each child will be constantly assessing everything to make sure things are distributed evenly. In this video, I provide... Read more

Staying Sane With a Full House

Last updated on: June 4, 2019 at 7:25 pm By Sarah Hamaker

The following is an excerpt from my interview with Lettice Barnum on my podcast, You’ve Got This. Lettice is a busy stay-at-home mom to five young children, including four wildly energetic boys and one incredibly loved baby girl. She and her husband, Ryan, are co-founders of Achieving Family Goals, where they blog about all things goal-related. They chronicle the experiences and lessons learned from working on their own 100 Life Goals list, while encouraging others to do the same by... Read more

How to Avoid Favortism With Your Kids

Last updated on: May 18, 2019 at 6:36 pm By Sarah Hamaker

Parents have been picking favorites from among their children since time began—to disastrous consequences. Patterns of favoritism can become ingrained in the family fabric, but the fluidity of family life may help to balance out those preferences. In this video, let’s examine in detail some of the ways we can put the lid on preferences in our families. Read more

Competition

Last updated on: May 17, 2019 at 11:55 pm By Sarah Hamaker

Sibling competition has been around as long as there have been siblings. Competition often begins as soon as a new sibling arrives at the home. However, not all competition between siblings is unhealthy. All parents have the urge to put our children into neat little boxes—the smart one, the funny one, the creative one, or the athletic one. Even if we never consciously say the words aloud, these labels often are heard and understood by our children loud and clear.... Read more

The Importance of Volunteering Together

Last updated on: June 29, 2019 at 12:22 am By Sarah Hamaker

The following is an excerpt from my interview with Alexandra Fung on my podcast, You’ve Got This. Alexandra is the co-founder and CEO of Upparent.com, a website that makes it easy for parents to discover and share recommendations with one another about local things to do, places to go and products to try as a family, including volunteer opportunities. Family and community have long been central to Alex’s life. After graduating from the University of Notre Dame and NYU School... Read more

Thinking the Best, not the Worst

Last updated on: May 17, 2019 at 11:25 pm By Sarah Hamaker

Acts of charity should be frequent in our homes, but in reality our children rarely perform such magnanimous deeds for each other. Why do our kids treat one another with meanness instead of kindness, with a shove rather than a helping hand, and with harsh words instead of a sweet spirit? Because of their own sinful hearts, yes, but also because we have failed to instill in them how to truly love one another. If you think well of someone,... Read more

How Helpful Are TV Ratings?

Last updated on: May 24, 2019 at 12:10 am By Sarah Hamaker

The following is an excerpt from my interview with Melissa Henson on my podcast, You’ve Got This. Melissa is program director for the Parents Television Council, a nonpartisan education organization advocating for responsible entertainment. She is a noted expert on entertainment industry trends and the how the impact of entertainment affects children and the American popular culture at large. She also directs the organization’s Advertiser Accountability Campaign, which encourages companies to sponsor family-friendly entertainment. Melissa previously supervised the research and... Read more

Summertime Means More Play, Less Work for Teens

Last updated on: June 7, 2019 at 4:06 pm By Sarah Hamaker

By Sarah Hamaker A couple of months ago, Naomi, my 16-year-old, high school sophomore, just got her first job—scooping ice cream at a local independent ice cream parlor. She’s already realized working is hard, well, work, but she likes her co-workers and has big plans for her paychecks, including saving for the future and giving to charity. While a couple of her friends also have part-time jobs, most of her fellow high schoolers seem to have little interest in regular,... Read more

How I’ve Stopped Cleaning My House

Last updated on: April 23, 2019 at 8:44 pm By Sarah Hamaker

The following is an excerpt from my podcast, “You’ve Got This.” I don’t clean my house anymore. No, I don’t live in a pigsty with massive dust bunnies creeping out from under my furniture. Instead, my four children do the lion’s share of the housecleaning these days, and it’s wonderful. Not that everything’s perfectly cleaned, but every week, the bathrooms and kitchen are wiped down. The floors are vacuumed and mopped. The grass is mowed, and the weeds are pulled.... Read more

The Importance of Getting Along

Last updated on: May 17, 2019 at 11:22 pm By Sarah Hamaker

Why should parents care that their children are fighting? In this video, I talk about how being pleasant and kind to one another has a more far-reaching significance than peace at that moment. Children who learn to resolve conflict within a family through interactions with brothers and sisters have an advantage when they encounter discord outside of the home. That also points to the most important reason why parents should assist their children in moving from sibling rivals to friends:... Read more