It is never easy to lose a parent

Josh Marshall is mourning the loss of his dad and writing about it movingly.

I think we understood each other. I remember last year at my wedding, after I broke the glass and kissed my new wife, turning to him and hugging him, holding and being held by him. And I think it was complete. In all the years I knew my father I don’t think there was any time I knew him happier or more content than in the final years of his life.

Two days after he died I wrote him a long letter that was with him when he was cremated. I told him how much I missed him and how much I loved him. I asked him to tell my mother I love her. And I told him I’d see them both again.

I think when we lose parents we always wonder about unfinished business. I know, I did, when I lost both of my birth parents, and most of the time, I think “yes…we got it all cleared up…”, as I’ve alluded to, here. But there are other times, I know it’s not all done. That’s just how life is.

When my brother S died our Italian neighbors came over with kisses (and food) and one word, “condole…” which brought with it enormous meaning and consolation at a time when few words met the case. It said, “I have no words, but I have known your grief, and will know it again, and I am so sorry you must know it now…”

Condole, Mr. Marshall.