Church Sign Epic Fails, “Devil’s Done Got You” Edition

If God had had a mullet, I’m pretty sure it would look kinda like that one on the guy in “East Bound and Down.” Homeboy knows how to party in the back while keepin’ it business in the front.

Nothing compels me like redneck fundamentalism.

Yeah, cause we’ve really been itching for a fresh sacrifice lately…

Psst, don’t tell Jacob his ladder doesn’t go all the way.

I always heard it was when you masturbated, an angel died, but whatever…

The hardest part is getting them to hold still while also holding the hammer…

No, no, no…we’re absolutely not pandering to the lowest common denominator. P.S.: BOOBIES.

Yeah, he just lets them dribble down his upper lip into his handkerchief of humility.

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About Christian Piatt

To learn about Christian Piatt's new project, "A**hole Christian Survival Guide," and to pre-order your copy, visit The humorous illustrated book will include Christian cliches, games and a lot more.

  • GDwarf

    …What’s that last one even supposed to mean? That modesty mans not sharing knowledge with others?

  • Naked Bunny with a Whip

    There oughtta be a law stopping babies from having lethal premarital sex.

  • chrisnbama

    Based on your Church Sign threads, there is definitely an opportunity for a Christian based PR company that caters to small churches to more intelligently convey their messages.