Church Sign Epic Fails, “Devil’s Done Got You” Edition

If God had had a mullet, I’m pretty sure it would look kinda like that one on the guy in “East Bound and Down.” Homeboy knows how to party in the back while keepin’ it business in the front.

Nothing compels me like redneck fundamentalism.

Yeah, cause we’ve really been itching for a fresh sacrifice lately…

Psst, don’t tell Jacob his ladder doesn’t go all the way.

I always heard it was when you masturbated, an angel died, but whatever…

The hardest part is getting them to hold still while also holding the hammer…

No, no, no…we’re absolutely not pandering to the lowest common denominator. P.S.: BOOBIES.

Yeah, he just lets them dribble down his upper lip into his handkerchief of humility.

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About Christian Piatt

Christian Piatt is the creator and editor of BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BIBLE and BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT JESUS. He has a memoir on faith, family and parenting called PREGMANCY: A Dad, a Little Dude and a Due Date, and Hachette published his first hardcover book, "postChristian: What's left? Can we fix it? Do we care?" in 2014. His first novel, "Blood Doctrine," has been optioned by a Hollywood production company for a possible TV series.

Christian is the cofounder and cohost of the Homebrewed CultureCast, a podcast about popular culture, current events and spirituality that has a weekly audience of 25,000 people (

Preorder Christian's next book, "Not That Kind of Christian: Loving God without being an a**hole," at

For more information about Christian, visit, or find him on Twitter ( or Facebook.

  • GDwarf

    …What’s that last one even supposed to mean? That modesty mans not sharing knowledge with others?

  • Naked Bunny with a Whip

    There oughtta be a law stopping babies from having lethal premarital sex.

  • chrisnbama

    Based on your Church Sign threads, there is definitely an opportunity for a Christian based PR company that caters to small churches to more intelligently convey their messages.