Patheos Peeps: Dilshad Ali on “Extreme Parenting”

Every Friday, I post a link to a blog post written by one of my fellow bloggers at Patheos, a web portal devoted to religion and spirituality. I encourage my blog readers to click through to read these posts, comment, and if you like what you read, follow these bloggers as well.

Since joining the Patheos team of bloggers in December, I’ve quickly become a fan of Dilshad Ali, who blogs as the “Muslimah Next Door.” Ali has three children, including “Lil D,” a son with autism. I keep thinking of a post from last week in which Ali contemplates the constant strain and activity of trying to meet all of her family’s needs, the pressures associated with the “extreme parenting” that is required when one has a child with significant special needs.

She ends her post, which includes some description of her daily life that is exhausting to read, much less live, with this:

But, as my husband reminds me from time to time, we have two other children, and we both have jobs, and we want to spend a little time together each day where autism and kids don’t dominate the conversation. So, as the saying goes, something’s gotta give.

Can someone tell me what that is?

You can read the whole thing here.

About Ellen Painter Dollar

Ellen Painter Dollar is a writer focusing on faith, parenting, family, disability, and ethics. She is the author of No Easy Choice: A Story of Disability, Faith, and Parenthood in an Age of Advanced Reproduction (Westminster John Knox, 2012). Visit her web site at for more on her writing and speaking, and to sign up for a (very) occasional email newsletter.

  • Priscilla

    Great blog by Dilshad Ali. She writes that she is concerned because she doesn’t feel she is meeting all the needs of her children, and she is probably right she is not. That being said, who ever can meet all the needs of one person, much less 3 or if you include her and her husband, 5? Do your best, be authentic with your children, and as she says, pray with them. That is all we can do.