The issue is can men and women be friends, that is Are cross-gender friendships do-able? I came across this post at Live Better America blog and thought I’d clip a bit for here:
What are your guidelines or rules? What policies are in place in churches?
Men are men. Women are women. We’re genetically wired to, if not check each other out, at least notice when there’s attraction. Behavioral scientists say it’s primal: We can’t help it; the survival of the species depends on that which begins with a glance. So, too, are men programmed to be predisposed toward sex and women to see relationships as central, which isn’t to say that men can’t commit and women aren’t sexual beings. It’s just biology keeping things in balance….
So, can men and women be friends? It largely depends on the scenario in which their connection is playing out. Here are the top three friendliest:
With an activity or work partner with whom you share a common interest or focus
They’re more than an acquaintance, but less than a social friend. You mutually benefit from the interaction, but don’t spend time together outside of that context. Such friendships can sometimes turn into more.
Between exes who forge a congenial relationship for the good of everyone, often their children
Former loves have, in all or part, “spent” their attraction, so friendship is a possibility. However, it can be easy, especially in the early stages of separation, to cave in to old impulses, so it’s important to clearly articulate and adhere to boundaries.
When neither party is physically attracted to the other but they share a unique connection
The parties aren’t activity partners as in Scenario No. 1, yet they share constructive energy. If one party develops an interest beyond friendship, though, the relationship stands to change or disintegrate.
Understanding the clear differences between how the sexes approach relationships can make life — and friendship — easier.