In today’s New York Times is a story about people who blog so much it kills them. It talks about the stress of bloggers “toiling under great physical and emotional stress created by the around-the-clock Internet economy that demands a constant stream of news and comment.” (That article, “In Web World of 24/7 Stress, Writers Blog Till They Drop,” is here.)
You know, I blog quite a bit, and I certainly do experience the constant stress of having to meet the demands of the Internet economy. This is mainly because, for me, participating in the Internet economy through blogging means getting paid virtual money. I like virtual money, but have trouble trading it for stuff.
Just yesterday, for instance, I was trying to buy a gallon of milk, and when the cashier said, “That’ll be $7.50,” I said, “Oh, that’s all right. I blog a lot.” And she had the nerve to look at me like I was crazy. Hoping to enlighten this mall-bangs-wearing gum chewer about my vital role in the stress-filled world of the Internet economy, I continued. “Seriously. I post five, six times a week. Pretty long pieces, too. Some of them are quite humorous.”
Instead of replying with the expected, “Would you like paper or plastic?”, she called security. And if you don’t think it’s stressful being thrown out of a Von’s by a guy probably running a blog called, “I Am Too A Cop,” then you need to get more involved with the Internet economy.
And blogging isn’t compromising only my mental health, either. My back and neck are in constant pain. The problem is that I blog while lying on my couch, which is dangerously soft and fluffy. This means that within minutes of my beginning yet another grueling blog post, all you can see on our couch is my head, my stomach, and my laptop. That’s not good for me. And it’s not good for my wife, either, whose nerves are a wreck from the stress of constantly having to urge me to get a job that pays actual, legal tender. Or to at least move my feet.
No, fellow bloggers, we’re not suffering from any sort of imaginary ailment. This is real. It’s time the medical and psychiatric community recognize what so many of us have known for so long now. We’re suffering from Blogger’s Syndrome. Or, as I’m sure it’ll come to be known, B.S.