Obama’s Response to “About Your SCROTUS, POTUS”

Imagine my surprise when I received the following e-mail from President Obama just moments ago:

Dear Mr. Shore:

It was with considerable bemusement that I read your blog post of April 14, About Your SCROTUS, POTUS, which was forwarded to me by one of my aides, with whom I’ll later today be discussing career opportunities in the White House mail room.

I understand, Mr. Shore, that you are a man in your early fifties. When I first read your post, I imagined that you were quite a bit younger — college-age, perhaps, or  high school. But since then I’ve discovered that you’re actually a grown man.

As I trust you are aware, the correct acronym for the Supreme Court of the United States is SCOTUS, not SCROTUS. But SCROTUS is funnier, isn’t it? Because it sounds so much like the word “scrotum.” Back in elementary school, my pals and I never tired of laughing at such humor. We thought all kinds of humor about body parts and body functions was funny.

Ah, those were the days. We were just boys then, with barely a care in the world. The future was wide open before us, inviting us to make of it whatever we could.

Did you ever look up the word “fart” in a dictionary, Mr. Shore? That would probably be a lot of fun for you. If you have one handy, I’d suggest using the superb American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language. I keep a copy of it right here on my desk. I was just using it, in fact, to help me draft an important speech I’ll soon be delivering on the state of our Armed Services as they continue fighting and dying in the war against oppression and tyranny that continues in Iraq and Afghanistan.

SCOTUS. SCROTUS. They sure do sound alike! It must make you awfully proud to have brought such levity to your blog readers, of which I’m sure you have dozens.

Now I trust you didn’t let all that fun you have get in the way of filing your tax return on time, did you? Ha, ha, ha. I’m sure you didn’t. I’ve requested the IRS to flag your return and forward me a copy. I’m looking forward to personally reviewing it.

Best to you, Mr. Shore. Keep up the good work! And best of luck to you in your career.

Sincerely yours,

POTUS

About John Shore

John Shore (who, fwiw, is straight) is the author of UNFAIR: Christians and the LGBT Question, and three other great books. He is founder of Unfundamentalist Christians (on Facebook here), and executive editor of the Unfundamentalist Christians group blog.  (In total John's two blogs receive some 250,000 views per month.) John is also co-founder of The NALT Christians Project, which was written about by TIME,  The Washington Post, and others. His website is JohnShore.com. You're invited to like John's Facebook page. Don't forget to sign up for his mucho-awesome newsletter.

  • http://luwandi.wordpress.com Beth Luwandi

    Shhh my college comp students are doing peer review on their opus magnum for the semester; I just got them settled again and I can't laugh out loud! The fact we can hear students in a nearby classroom shrieking "NoOOOO, noo nooooo!" when the teacher announces "Oprah!" as a current event category is funny enough. We thought maybe the teacher was beating someone. Ope, now he is announcing "Sports, sports, sports, sports, sports!" amid cheers. So, you were saying….

  • http://www.facebook.com/narnar Natalie

    I wonder if he actually wrote this himself! I know presidents have all kinds of writers on staff, which is fine – nothing wrong with that! But it would be even better if he actually wrote this himself. It's nice to know that the POTUS has your back. :)

    • soulmentor

      And, as we've often seen, a great sense of humor. But is that letter for real?!

  • http://www.lisamertins.com lisa

    hilarious! discovered this here blog thanks to huffpo. you're a riot, which will no doubt be noted in the coming tax evasion trial. here's hoping o gets good scrotus on top that trickles down…

  • Matt

    If the government has a poet laureate, why not have a comedian too? I'm guessing you're one of the few comedians whose scrotus jokes could live up to the president's standards.

    • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

      that's very kind of you.

  • http://soiledwings.com Sherry Meneley

    Love this. How lucky you are to get a personal response from Obie (one kenobi). What a cool dude. He’s got some good PR. Condolences on the coming audit. (crap, I just swallowed my gum – that is random, but I thought I’d share…)

  • http://skerrib.blogspot.com skerrib

    The word “fart” ALWAYS makes me giggle.

    • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

      Your husband is a lucky, lucky man.

  • http://kenreads.wordpress.com wken

    So, is that a "yes"?

  • http://www.steppingintothelight.net Diane L. Harris

    Dear John,

    A) I believe the above "email" is a figment of your imagination,

    and

    B) Supreme Court REPRESENTATIVES?

    C) Still hilarious.

    • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

      You got it, as always.

  • Jim Hagen

    I've always seen a bizarre link between "scrotal" and "sacerdotal." Don't ask me why.

  • http://www.testazyk.com Thomas Stazyk

    You are an evil man! You sent me to the dictionary to look up ‘fart’ after I realized I’d probably never done it before. That gave me two good laughs today–your post and the ‘clinical’ definition.

  • Prolix

    Hate to burst your bubble, but SCROTUS was penned as early as 2004 to mean: Supreme Court Republicans of the United States. There have been many attempts to relabel it but the original definition stands. It never officially applied to representatives and, in fact, they are referred to as Justices, so the proper acronym, if you were attempting to refer to the judges and not merely the branch of government, it would be SCJOTUS. And yes, obviously a fabricated email. Your post is great fun otherwise. :)


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