The Spiritual Practices of Spiritual Direction: The Examen
Reflecting on our lives is the heart of spiritual direction. Our life is where we meet and experience the Source of all life, so looking at where we’ve been and what we’ve become is how we develop awareness of the Spirit’s way of being with us. There is no better prayer practice for reflection than the Ignatian Examen, sometimes called the Awareness Examen or just the Examen. It is precisely what its name implies—an examination (the loving, gentle kind) of a period of time in our … [Read More...]
Common Spiritual Longings
Spiritual direction is a specialty ministry. It is designed to assist those who long for a companion on their spiritual journey. It’s not particularly goal-oriented like life coaching or diagnostic like therapy. Not everyone needs spiritual direction. Some people find guidance in a host of other places: within themselves, from friends, from spiritual reading, or by taking classes. So, who needs spiritual direction? In many cases, people will choose a spiritual director during a … [Read More...]
Warning Signs in Spiritual Direction
In spiritual direction as in much of life, you have to be careful. While most spiritual directors (I believe) are highly ethical and want only the best for you, there have been cases of abuse by spiritual directors. That is why I recommend everyone interested in spiritual direction (directors and directees) obtain and read a copy of the small booklet A Code of Ethics for Spiritual Directors so that you know what is and is not acceptable behavior by a spiritual director. Warning signs that you … [Read More...]
Your rights in spiritual direction
When you enter a spiritual direction relationship you are entering a world in which there is a specific culture and ethics but no actual overseeing body that can guarantee your rights. So, like much else in life it is a case of “let the buyer beware.” Most spiritual directors are kind, loving and highly ethical people. But there have been cases of abuse by spiritual directors. So what can you rightly expect in spiritual direction? What do the highest ethics in a director get … [Read More...]
Spiritual Directors’ Code of Ethics
Although there is no governing body overseeing and monitoring spiritual directors, there is a code of ethics we work by. Developed in the early 1990’s by spiritual directors who were also working in confidential helping professions such as social work, therapy, pastoral counseling and pastoral ministry, this code is found in an inexpensive booklet by Dove Publications called A Code of Ethics for Spiritual Directors. This booklet is mandatory reading and study for anyone working as a … [Read More...]
Your First Session
The first session with a new spiritual director can sometimes feel as awkward as a first date. You have a lot you want to know about the director and he or she has a lot they want to get to know about you. That’s why it can be hard to tell from just one session if you have found a good fit. In the first session, the director may have some introductory material to present to you. He or she may want to say a bit more about how they do spiritual direction and what a few of the boundaries are. … [Read More...]
When Spiritual Directors are Hard to Find
If you live in a metropolitan area, you will probably have lots of spiritual directors to choose from. But if you are in rural America, you may be lucky to have even one within driving distance of you. That does not mean you are limited to that one director! Technology is changing the way spiritual direction is done. Sure, there are some spiritual directors who will only work with people in person. But more and more you are able to find directors who use Skype or the telephone for sessions. I … [Read More...]
Intuition and the Search for a Spiritual Director
Intuition is an inner knowing that is not necessarily based on cold, hard facts. Some people are better at identifying and listening to intuition than others. I want to reflect on how you may use your intuition to find the right spiritual director. One reason experts suggest you make appointments with at least three spiritual directors when you begin your search is so that you have a chance to be with three practitioners for one hour each and then reflect on how you felt in the presence of … [Read More...]
Finding a Good Fit in a Spiritual Director
One of the advantages of having a lot of spiritual direction training programs around these days is that—at least in some areas of the country—you have a lot of spiritual directors to choose from. Even with supply at its highest, it is important that you are comfortable with the person you choose. First, spend some time in prayer asking God to guide you to the right spiritual director. Do not skip this step! As a director, I spend time asking God to guide people who need to be in … [Read More...]
Two Styles of Spiritual Direction to Choose From
There are two basic styles of spiritual direction you can choose from, and it’s important to know which you prefer. These two styles are non-directive (also known as evocative) and directive. Non-Directive If you want a lot of spiritual directors to choose from and if you need someone trained primarily in non-judgmental listening, this is the style for you. As I’ve stated many times in this blog, most training programs teach this non-directive style, and as you know if you’ve read … [Read More...]
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